Bars are a big part of living in Chicago, a fact that is hard to miss for me (I'm a bartender at Schubas and iO). The behavior of bar patrons can fit a lot of descriptions: infuriating, amusing and downright odd. The strange occupation that is bartending gives me at least one memorable interaction every night. I publish these interactions 140 characters at a time in a series of tweets that I like to refer to as "bartweeting."
Here are some of the best tweets that I've compiled during my time as a professional drink pourer.
People never cease to be weird at a bar
Cheers to the couple that keeps separately coming up to the bar to take a shot alone think their sig other doesn't know/isn't doing the same
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) September 18, 2015
Man at bar celebrating his 30th birthday while wearing a shirt that says "I Shaved My Balls For This?" 😑
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) November 5, 2015
Bartending for a bike messenger meeting in which they are reading their new company manual out loud popcorn style
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) September 17, 2015
We've sold over 30 Red Bulls tonight. On an average night, we sell two. Chicago is #turnt. #HappyHalloween #bartweeting
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) November 1, 2015
And sometimes bros just don't know how to tip
A dude just paid for his $3 PBR with two dollars, three quarters, two nickels, and two pennies. That's $2.87. Bro walked away. No tip.
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) November 8, 2015
Don't tip me 10% and then ask for my number, bro
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) November 1, 2015
Carding people can be infuriating
*cards dude* "Wow, you're making me blush! Haven't been carded in a while!" 😑 "You're 23 years old."
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) September 10, 2015
Alcohol consumption can make manners go out the window
Super dope of you to give me $0 tip for a price on the menu that I don't control. Thanks! Come back soon! pic.twitter.com/tO3zc5bWtL
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) November 2, 2015
just remembered the guy who refused to drink the moscow mule i poured him because it wasn't in a copper mug
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) November 12, 2015
Favorite complaint of last night comes from man who insisted he get a new order of fries because someone had "BREATHED" all over his food
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) October 22, 2015
Today I told someone I'd "be right with them" because I was making someone else's drink. They said "hurry up." I told them to leave the bar.
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) October 4, 2015
Musicians aren't exactly normal either
Had to explain to band from Germany what the grain "corn" was.
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) November 19, 2015
Dude in band bantering between songs for WAY too long, other band member goes, "did you just hit your word count for this essay? Jesus."
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) November 8, 2015
The creeps come out at night
I asked a man if he was here for drinks or food. "Neither. Your exquisite beauty." His wife walks in. "Ah, my keeper is here." 😑
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) October 26, 2015
But sometimes people can be awesome
A stranger sitting at the bar just ran across the street and bought me a bag of chips just because I mentioned I was hungry in passing
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) November 16, 2015
i don't think that's a valid signature, but nice try pic.twitter.com/hOSqSEDkp2
— Kate Byrne (@katebyrnepower) November 19, 2015