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How to date a chef

An easy nine-step plan to get in a chef’s pants.

Perhaps you’ve gotten the memo that chefs are really hot right now. Hell, even the not-hot ones are hot. But getting their attention takes special skills. “When I’m in the dining room, me personally, I don’t see hot girls, I just see guests,” one typically tunnel-visioned chef tells us. “I’m not looking at breasts. I’m looking at, Wow, why aren’t they eating the corn pudding?” How do you flirt with a chef who’s on the job (and trust us, chefs are always on the job)? One chef and several groupies who have closed the deal offer these foolproof tips.

1 “Make the latest reservation possible at the restaurant where the chef works. Sit at the bar to eat. Bring a cute wingman.”—Groupie, 36, Humboldt Park

2 If the chef visits your table, compliment the food. “Chefs are like artists; stroking their egos is never a bad thing.”—Groupie, 21, Evanston

3 Don’t waste time being coy. “Chefs are morons…if somebody wants to hit on a chef they have to be very, very blunt and forward and very aggressive.”—Chef, 35, Gold Coast

4 “Don’t try to flirt with the chef while they are plating food or cooking. They are 100 percent in their zone and won’t even remember meeting you.”—Groupie, 32, River North

5 “Close the place down, pick up on where the crew is heading for drinks after they close the kitchen, say, ‘Maybe we’ll see you there,’ wind up there.”—Groupie, 36, Humboldt Park

6 “Beat the chef at pool.”—Groupie, 36, Humboldt Park

7 “Chefs are very creative, visual people so they respond well to photos. Facebook them and post away.”—Groupie, 32, River North

8 The morning after, “don’t be afraid to cook for a chef. It can be intimidating, but they’ll appreciate it because they are always cooking for others and rarely have somebody cook for them.”—Groupie, 21, Evanston

9 After your first tryst, “don’t sit and linger at the bar again for at least a week—especially if you want more than a hookup.”—Groupie, 36, Humboldt Park

 

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