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For pee's sake

It's hot and you're sucking down the third overpriced light beer at a Grant Park fest when suddenly you're struck by a certifiable potty emergency. Dash to these spots if you want to sit instead of squat.

Having visions of fancy-washroom grandeur? Visit the Palmer House Hilton Hotel(17 E Monroe St) and pee in a slice of history. With its turn-of-the-century glam, you’ll feel miles away from the schlub who stomped on your pedicure at Lollapalooza.

A favorite gotta-pee move among tourists, the Starbucks duck and run is totally legit during festival season. The closest location to Grant Park, inside CNA Plaza North (55 E Jackson Bvd), is large enough that no one will notice. Unless they catch on and institute a bathroom-key policy—then, you might have to buy a third iced coffee of the day (or find another Starbucks).

Ah, the library: home to air conditioning, unlocked bathrooms and haggard people looking at Internet porn. The Harold Washington Library(400 S State St) is just a stone’s throw from Grant Park. Just don’t try to take that magazine in with you.

At the Monroe Parking Garage(350 E Monroe St), you can park your vehicle in the cheapest priced East Loop garage, and your butt (on a sort-of-clean toilet seat). It’ll make the parking price you’ll pay during festival season seem a bit more worth it. Well, that and walking the opposite direction as the mob heads toward the CTA at the end of the night.

 

 

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Festival cover bands | Fair play | Festival food pyramid | Sunning spots | What to wear to this year’s festivals | Greasy festival food | Summer festival bathroom guide | Ethnic street festivals | Festival survival pack | Local craft beer at festivals | Summer festival organizers

 

 

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