Heard on the street, November 1, 2013 edition

Is that guy homeless or dressed as a scarecrow?

I wanna go to Chattanooga for the reunion, wear a nice suit and pretend that my life is going well.

You know the history of the opposable thumb is to jerk off, right?

I told Dusty I was going to eat his mom�s asshole and he didn�t respond.

I think �New York cake� is code for cocaine.

What more can you ask for? Beers, bands and bros. Bring on the bitches!

I just had a total Kevin McAllister moment. I was walking down the street and both of my grocery bags broke.

If your 13-year-old boy is wearing a Chanel hoodie, you might want to start wondering about him.

This is the most chillwave pizza box ever!