Easily the most bizarre holiday event this season, this charity bonanza (organized by Lincoln Square eatery Taco in a Bag) features comedians Neil Hamburger and Mark the Knife; pin-up stars Masuimi Max and Maya Sinstress; Chicago electro-pop act Celine Neon and a screening of kooky holiday found footage assembled by Everything Is Terrible. Attendees will also be treated to unlimited Kickapoo Joy Juice and Ramblin' Root Beer all night long. To attend, donate an unused, unopened toy to Taco and A Bag prior to the event. Otherwise, tickets can be purchased online in exchange for a small donation. Go ahead, make a kid's day.