Illustration Ellen Wishart
Pub crawling is a noble art – it’s not for the fainthearted and you have to get it right. My advice: have a game plan and an end in sight. The combination of boozing and frequent movement offsets the possibility of getting utterly bladdered, and the prospect of a finish line means you can stagger into the final pub like a marathon runner with friends.
The South Bank offers the crawling drinker a plethora of alcoholic establishments (and a Slug and Lettuce). So, you’ve donned your sturdy walking shoes, you’ve popped to the cashpoint – let’s crawl!
Okay, the name is the wrong way round, and it’s a gastropub, but there’s a mighty fine selection of draught beers to sample here, so it makes a good first stop. If you’re going to eat, best make sure your party doesn’t include any veggies – this is a pub that revels in carnivorism. (Is that a word? It is now.)
36 The Cut, SE1 8LP
All pub crawls should include a KA, and this one – with its hanging baskets, top-notch ales and sticky wooden floor – is a classic. Drink number two, sorted.
25 Roupell St, SE1 8TB
Stop number three is situated opposite the ITV studios, so you might catch Ant and Dec enjoying a swift pint (between them).
89 Upper Ground, SE1 9PP
You can’t go to Waterloo and ignore this railway arch gaff. Sup a mild, and you’re ready for the home straight…
5 Mepham St, SE1 8SQ
For three Saturdays only, I’ve got myself a tent, a bar, a band, a variety show and an audience – you! – and I look forward to seeing you at the end of your crawl. Cheers!
London Wonderground, Jubilee Gardens, SE1 8XX
See Al Murray the Pub Landlord on tour
Missed out on the Edinburgh Fringe? No problem. You can experience practically every single comic* from this year's festival in just eight or so hours at this one-day mini-fest. The huge line-up will be revealed on the day, but past acts include Al Murray, Daniel Kitson, Bridget Christie and Sara Pascoe. It's all organised by comic Michael Legge, and proceeds go to MIND, the mental health charity. *Rough estimate.