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Beyonce: Life is But a Dream: an Imagine Special

Thur Mar 28, 10.35pm-12.05am, BBC1

You know those celebrity magazine exclusives which promise a peek behind the scenes: an insight into the ‘real person’ behind the public façade? But what they actually deliver is just a different, equally stage-managed aspect of that same life? Imagine that, for an hour and a half, and you’re somewhere close to the pointless, tedious, self-hagiography of this film.

That it’s produced and directed by the lady herself isn’t a good sign and it soon becomes clear that perspective won’t be an issue. This wouldn’t in itself be a bar to fun or revelation – we can think of several pop stars whose own take on their bonkers lives would be wildly entertaining. But Beyonce isn’t attempting entertainment, as such. This is an exercise in self-branding and arguably, a severely misfiring one – if you pretend to be revealing everything and it’s still this dull, what does that say about you?

If you want to know about Beyonce, avoid this like the plague and listen to her canon of gloriously effervescent pop music instead. Because that’s all she wrote.