You know the drill. No backpacks, no outside food or drink, no umbrellas.
Or maybe you don't know the drill. Maybe you’re the one among us having an early midlife crisis, hoping to experience more of the world, getting dragged to a Chicago music festival by your cool new friend you barely know but who really needed someone to buy that extra ticket they got stuck with. Now’s your time to shine, live a little, have a blast. #YOLO or something. Just keep in mind the following tips and you’ll be singing along in no time.
1. Bring Advil (or your preferred painkiller).
2. Do not eat eggs the morning of. I repeat, do not eat eggs the morning of.
3. Bringing your own bit of toilet paper never hurt anyone.
4. Sunglasses! Wear old ones. You’re an adult with a job so you probably own a quality pair. Do NOT wear that pair to the fest. You will lose them.
5. Do NOT bring your whole wallet. Keep credit cards and your Social Security card at home, please.
6. DO bring cash. And keep it in a secure place (not your shoe).
7. Wear a messenger bag, cross-shoulder bag or, depending on the festival, a sweet fanny pack (nothing too big and bulky, and nothing you can’t keep close to your person).
8. How big is that pack? Can you fit a little poncho in there? It may seem nerdy but honestly, if it rains, you can bet you won’t be the only person covered in plastic.
9. Wear a light hoodie you don’t mind wearing, sitting on, and, at some point in the day, most likely leaving behind.
10. Be prepared to exchange money for food tickets and food tickets for actual food and then ending up with less tickets than can get you food and not being able to get your money back. Just embrace it.
11. If this is a ticketed event, you probably can’t re-enter. (That means you can’t step outside to call the babysitter—or the dog-sitter.)
12. Take a small sunscreen. Remember to re-apply said sunscreen. Once in the morning isn’t going to cut it.
13. Buy merch early and ask if the staff can hold it for you at the table. (Otherwise that poster is going to get crushed.)
14. Plan your day in advance to cut down on walks between stages and/or last-minute decisions and disappointments.
15. Try not to embarrass yourself (or your new friend). You’re too old for autographs.
16. Drink water. That combination of sun and alcohol is even more worrisome the older we get.
17. Bring a portable charger for your phone (always a good tip).
18. Don’t forget to eat!
19. Protect what little hearing you have left with a good pair of earplugs. Just because the show is outside doesn’t mean the volume will be any less earsplitting.
20. Finally, embrace your youthful you. There are tens of thousands of people here. Who cares? Put on your rattiest pair of Chucks and your old favorite band tee (not the headliners’ tee), and live in the moment for once in your life.
LollapaloozaPhotograph: cousindaniel.com