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Photograph: Courtesy CC/Flickr/<a href="" target="_blank" rel="nofollow">Ken Stein</a>

10 people that should be permanently banned from the subway

Brian M.

The New York subway tunnels are the arteries and veins for getting millions of New Yorkers where they need to go, and back. Unfortunately, anytime you put that many people together for anything, there’s bound to be plenty of assholes. (Or maybe that's just NYC)

Here is a list of the charmers and mental giants you may encounter:  

The Bouncer

The person who stands directly in front of the doors, as if they’re checking IDs before you get on and off the train.

The Prepper

The person who gets up on a crowded train two stops before their actual stop to prepare to depart, as if the train door opens for only one second per station. 

The Model

The person who's decided the subway car is their personal boudair and the perfect place to apply all of their make-up.

The Drinker

The person who blatantly drinks or smokes on train before eventually passing out.

The Music Man

Solo or with a group, they will perform a song that lasts the length of time in between stops and then hit you up for $$.  

Mr. “Showtime”

A combination of The DJ and The Music Man, this talented dance ensemble will provide you abysmal music and hit you up for $$.

The DJ

The person who has decided that their abysmal choice of music should be the soundtrack for your commute.

The Body Double

This is the idiot with the large backpack that has now doubled their depth, painfully unaware that every time they spin they knock over multiple people. 

Bag Man\Lady

The least offensive of the bunch, except that their collection of plastic bags, knapsacks, and carry-on luggage takes up three seats.

The Seat-Runners

The person who will knock down a blind, pregnant, one-legged grandmother to get a seat.  Hell awaits you my friend.  


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