[title]
No time for storage, there are some items that should be thrown straight into the garbage.
Broken umbrellas
Yes, we understand that it’s only the one corner that is drooping and that you spent $15 on it at Duane Reade just last week, but it has done its duty.
Expired MetroCards
It’s a delight when the machine gives you any card beyond the basic yellow, even if it is a giant advertisement for a local college or Gap. You love that card, you refill that card constantly (or at least monthly), but then a year goes by and it’s expired, the machine gives you a new one, for free. If the MTA rejects it, so should you.
Take Out menus
You know that you're just going to order from your preferred delivery app, anyway.
Pizza Rat memorabilia
He had his 10 minutes of fame, and–real talk, guys–New York City rats typically live 5 to 12 months: He’s most likely dead now.
Holiday cards of friends and relatives standing in front of their houses
We get it—we live in cramped squalor. We don’t need photographic proof that you have nicer residences than we do any longer. Also, the holidays are over.
Any Bloomberg election gear
He had a good run, but now that De Blasio has been in charge for two years, it's time to retire that 2010 t-shirt.
The subway map you got when you moved into your first New York apartment
If the map still has the W line on it, place it directly into the recycling.
Your selfie stick
Sure, it's useful if you ever find yourself alone on the Empire State Building's observation deck, but you look like a total tourist using it (and it mostly sits in the closet anyway).
Ash trays
You know you can't afford New York City cigarette prices. And if you want to smoke, it'll soon be nice enough to do it outside.
The DVD box set of The Apprentice, starring Presidential hopeful Donal Trump
Even if you don't think it's embarrassing that you own it, your friends surely do.