As Leo Tolstoy once said, “All happy couples are the same. But all single people are single for, like, totally different reasons.” In New York, where dating is often an uphill climb with plenty of potential landmines, this is especially true. Spend some time dating in the city, and you’ll definitely encounter these types of singles.
1. The chained-to-their-media-job single
Even if you get them away from their office for a date, they’ll spend the entire time on their phone checking Twitter. They barely even know what bar they’re in right now, but they’ll definitely answer your question right after they finish reading that article on Gawker.
2. The picky native
Nothing you say will be good enough on this date with someone who’s either a native New Yorker or boasts at least one international parent. After making you pick the bar, they’ll spend the rest of the date subtly complaining about it.
3. The Brooklyn playboy
This guy basically has a girl at every L stop. This is probably the fourth date he’s been on this week and he sends messages on OK Cupid more than he texts.
4. The urban romantic
They’ve seen way too many romantic comedies (probably moved to New York because of them) and are already thinking about what it would be like to live with you before the second round of drinks arrive. Their favorite questions involve family, long-term goals and animal preferences.
5. The Broadway diva
Even if you can keep up with the obscure musical theater references, there's no way you'll be able to keep up with her friends. Proceed to karaoke bar nights with caution.
6. The dead inside hottie
They’ve been around the block a few times and have definitely been burned in the past. They’re incredibly open about embarrassing traits/personality flaws right out of the gate because they DGAF. They’ll probably take a cab back to your place with a quick stop at a DIY music venue in East Williamsburg.
7. The one who’s cheating on New York with you
This person really, really loves New York. They want to go on picnics in Central Park, and ride the Staten Island ferry, and take wild, spontaneous late-night trips to Coney Island.
8. The literally insane person
Halfway through the first date you’ll realize those quirky habits and wacky tangents are less “I’m taking improv classes at UCB” and more “someday there’s going to be an Investigation Discovery show about me.”
9. The Brooklyn party girl
At first you’ll find it super fun and refreshing to be someone who always wants to go out all the time but on the third night in a row that you’re dragging your alcohol-soaked body between Output and Verboten, you’ll probably realize that you can’t keep up.
10. The Manhattan party girl
You literally can’t afford to keep up.
11. The single and loving it
This independent creature is totally down with being single and probably only going out on this date as a favor to a friend. It’s more of a struggle to woo them—since they’re mainly thinking about that newest Netflix show—but if you do, they’re usually the most awesome. (And know the coolest things to do.)