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17 thoughts you'll have during NYC's brutal cold weekend

Will Gleason

New York has decided to celebrate President's Day Weekend this year with bone-chilling temperatures and unbelievable wind chills. (We're talking, like, -23 degrees below zero.) But, just like George Washington crossing the Delaware, we're just going to have to suck it up, throw on a super cute coat and get the job done.

While we're doing that, here are some thoughts we'll all probably have at least once.

1. “Man, I can’t believe it was this temperature for, like, four months last year.”

2. “Should I feel guilty about ordering Seamless right now? Is there an alternative to that?”

3. “You know who’s not changing out of sweatpants all day? This guy!” 

4. “How have I never realized that the only thing I ever want to eat is soup.” 

5. “I’ve literally never been happier walking onto a subway platform. This is the warmest I’ve been in hours.” 

6. “Cold without snow seems unfair.” 

7. “I'm allowed to drink all day, right? How many times can I use Minibar without being judged?”

8. “I can’t go to the store, so what can I make with half a pack of Ritz crackers, two packs of ketchup and… water.” 

9. “How many hot toddies are too many?” 

10. "Is the Invisible Man on YouTube? I need some fashion advice."

11. “How can it be this cold with the sun shining? Is nature setting a trap?” 

12. “How is Minneapolis a place of human settlement?”

13. “How many coats can I get away with wearing on top of one another?” 

14. “What show should I binge watch this weekend? Wait. What show shouldn’t I binge watch this weekend.”

15. “How much are flights to Florida? How much does it cost to move to Florida?”

16. “Has the Polar Vortex always existed? Or has it just been laying there, dormant, like that creature in The Thing?”

17. "Keep walking. Keep walking. Keep walking. Keep walking. Keep walking. Keep walking."


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