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25 types of roommates that you'll have when you live in New York

25 types of roommates that you'll have when you live in New York
Photograph: Courtesy CC/Flickr/Robert Judge

Just moved to New York and shopping around for someone to shack up with in the cheapest apartment you can find? As much as we all dream of finding the perfect person to live with, everyone has their own specific flaws. That said, here are 25 types of NYC roomies that you should especially be on the lookout for. (Because, unfortunately, we can't all live with this guy.)

1. The one who walks in on you masturbating and doesn’t know where to look

2. The girl who asks you what you think of her date outfit, and who you don’t know well enough to give an honest answer to, leading to this face:

3. The one who agrees with you that your current living situation is “just short-term”

4. The guy who asks incredibly personal questions despite the fact you’ve only known each other for 38 seconds

5. The one who moves their bedbugs in with them

6. The one who’s just waiting for their “big break” in New York…and has been for the last 15 years

7. The one who’s a little vague on how they actually intend to make the rent

8. The one who breaks things and pretends it wasn’t them

9. The one that knocks on your door at 3am after having “a little accident in the kitchen”

10. The one who ends up being kinda…distracting

11. That couple who you end up having that one regrettable drunken night with, and can’t even look at for the rest of your lease term

12. The endlessly pedantic bastard

13. The one who is constantly trying to hook-up with you

14. The one who is constantly trying to hook-up with your boyfriend

15. The one who likes to surprise you with “fun” activities—like booking you for a bikini wax without telling you first

16. The one you tell that really personal thing to, then instantly regret it

17. The one who eats all of your food, uses all of your stuff and wears all of your clothes, and doesn’t give the tiniest shit how you feel about it

18. The one who’s overly obsessed with your other roommate’s sex life

19. The guy that tells you way too much whenever he gets wasted

20. That miraculous one who actually does end up becoming your BFF

21. The one you catch doing that weird sex thing that will still be burned into your retinas 20 years from now

22. That guy who just casually drops the fact that, “Oh yeah, I can’t make my rent this month, bro”

23. The one who’s convinced they’re an amazing cook, and you’ve left it way too long to tell them they’re not

24. The one who means well

25. That perfect person who’s always agreeable and lovely and tidies up after themselves and you hope never, ever moves out*

 

*Just kidding. This never happens. 

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