Here's something you probably already know: New Year's Eve is the single most overrated holiday. It never lives up to the hype, you always end up too drunk and cabless, and then you spend days picking glitter out of your hair. NO MORE. This year, follow these simple rules to have a far less disappointing start to the new year.
RECOMMENDED: New Year's Eve in NYC
1. Set your expectations low. Real low. Think of this as a night out with friends where you all just happen to be wearing nice dresses and jackets.
2. Pick one location and STAY THERE. Do not bar hop. Do not plan on leaving to a second location after midnight because you're "sure they'll be cabs free then." Just don't.
3. Stay in your own goddamn borough, or better yet, your neighborhood. It's not worth it to face the masses on the subway, trust me.
4. Don't even THINK about going anywhere near Midtown. And DEFINITELY don't consider heading to Times Square to watch the ball drop. Do you know what kind of shitshow that scene is? You have to get there at noon! There are no bathrooms! If standing on your feet for 14 hours and being sober and freezing is your idea of a good time, be my guest. Or you could always buy $400 tickets to sit in Olive Garden, where your ticket doesn't include bread sticks or even a guarantee you can see the ball drop.
5. Two words: house party. If it's your house, and not really a party, and more of you watching TV in pajamas and drinking champagne straight out of the bottle, even better.
Happy New Year, New York!