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The British are coming...and they're bringing their sex party with them.

The British are coming...and they're bringing their sex party with them.

Close your eyes and imagine a world where women make all the rules. Now imagine they're all scantily clad, in masks and asking if you "fancy a shag". Well…only if you're incredibly rich, "sexually elite" and quite good-looking.

Killing Kittens—as in, every time someone masturbates, God kills a kitten—is a female-centric sex party started in London by Emma Sayle, an old school chum of Kate Middleton's, whose first event is this Saturday night in NYC. But before you head to Party City to buy a mask, listen up, there are some rules. First, men must be accompanied by a woman for entry and are never allowed to approach a woman they don't know. Everyone must be approved for membership, at which point you are free to purchase your $250 couples tickets ($50 for single ladies). But don't worry, it's not like you're not paying just for sex. There's a DJ. And oysters. But yeah, mostly the sex. The dress code is masks and cocktail attire (until it's not); so basically just like Eyes Wide Shut: masks, people doing each other, people doing each other in masks and probably Tom Cruise is creeping around somewhere, not approaching women. Hopefully it's just less confusing.

So if you're at JFK or LaGuardia this weekend and spot large groups of overachievers in power suits with an air of entitlement, don't worry, it's probably just the bankers, rich businessmen and "sextrepenuers" who allegedly meet up and fly their private jets to these parties around the world. If you aren't able to follow them to their secret "exclusive loft," don't worry, there are still two more KK events scheduled so we all still have time...the royal we, that is.

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