New Yorkers are a proud bunch. Our city is the best! Well, except for the weather. At least lately. This weather can suck a big bag of…well, you know. New Yorkers are dealing with the dreary, windy, wet, sticky weather as only we can: grudgingly. Here, the top ten weather-related calamities the Big Apple has to contend with:
1. Wind-created umbrella inversion
Seriously, why do we even bother? Be free, umbrella. Be freeeee!
2. Sideways rain
We don’t even understand how this happens, but it does. A lot.
3. No cabs
Not anywhere. Not at all.
4. Outdoor rain + subway-platform heat and humidity = frizz for all!
“Your hair is inexplicable!”
5. The humiliation of having to wear ugly footwear
Awesome outfit? Check. Cool purse? Check. Really ugly galoshes? Ugh, check.
6. Deceptively deep puddles
"This looks pretty shallow, I'm sure if I step in it, I'll be fi-"
7. Soldiering on through important meetings while pretending your pants aren’t soaking wet
Yeast infections for all!
8. Pop-up price-gouging umbrella vendors
Where do they even come from?
9. Slippery fall-inducing surfaces everywhere you turn
“I’m okay—no really, I am. No, I don’t need any help, thanks. Seriously, DON’T LOOK AT ME, YOU’RE MAKING IT WORSE!”
10. The smell of wet dog/wet socks/wet garbage everywhere
Only this weather could make us yearn for the pervasive smell of hot pee in summer.