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Where the Long Island City coyote probably went

A coyote was spotted atop a bar in Long Island City yesterday—and now he’s missing. We’ve got a few ideas of where he could be.

Written by Carla Sosenko
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A coyote wanders into a bar. Nope, that’s not the start of a joke but, as you’ve probably heard, some real-life news from Long Island City, where a coyote was spotted atop a bar last night. All we can say is, this is a coyote after our own heart—we’d head for the nearest bar, too. Now the coyote is missing, which got us thinking: Where else would a nightlife-lovin’ coyote head in the nabe?

Photograph: M. Wells Steakhouse: Virginia Rollison

M. Wells

What, you thought he was a vegetarian? We think he’ll go for the $105 bone-in chateaubriand, because this coyote looks like a baller.

Photograph: MoMA PS1: Courtesy Martin Seck

MoMA PS1

Just because he's a scavenging opportunist, it doesn't mean he doesn't like art, right? Pity it’s too early in the season for the Warm Up parties. Our furry friend looks like he could use some love, and what better way to mix and mingle with other hot boy and girl coyotes than at a sunny outdoor party?

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Photograph: The Creek and the Cave: Mindy Tucker

The Creek and the Cave

Now that he’s finally free, the coyote can pursue his dreams of being a stand-up. He grew up in a very conservative family of coyotes, where he was pressured to study medicine or finance—but his creative spirit can be quashed no longer. Open-mike night, here he comes!

Photograph: Courtesy Creative Commons/Flickr/Yourdon

Annable Basin Sailing Bar & Grill

A beer, a brat and some quality time ogling the Manhattan skyline with his brahs? You know it. It’s been a rough day—loads of paparazzi, animal control on his tail (literally)—the ’yote needs to mellow out, dude.

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Photograph: Peter Pan Bakery: Courtesy Creative Commons/Flickr/Robyn Lee

Peter Pan Bakery

Is it us, or does this coyote look like a hipster? We bet he wandered over the Pulaski into Greenpoint and headed right for Peter Pan. He’ll take one apple pie and an egg cream, please. Except, uh-oh, they’re cash only—and he doesn’t have any pockets! Or an ATM card! (Also, he’s a coyote!)

Photograph: Coyote Ugly: Courtesy Creative Commons/Flickr/Javier Hernández

Coyote Ugly

Look, he’s had his adventures, now he just misses his family. Our hero will end his day out in the city—where else?—Coyote Ugly. Except, oh God—that’s his sister dancing on the bar. Check, please!

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