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Our anti-hangover remedies

The most effective cure is abstinence...not.

DR

Every year like clockwork, the subject of ‘The New Years Eve Hangover’ comes around. It's January 1 and suddenly, no matter which channel you’re watching, which newspaper you open, or which website you’re on, the probability of stumbling across some article along the lines of: “It’s the morning after the night before, what’s the best hangover remedy?” rises to 99.99%.

And, here at Time Out Paris, we wanted to take part in this long-standing journalistic tradition. However, because we’re not secretly working for an industrial pharmaceutical firm, you’ll find only natural solutions here. And there’ll be no pre-emptive suggestions like “drink a litre of water before bed” or “don’t mix spirits” either – no poor, hungover soul wants to know what they should have done (or not done) last night. The damage is done - let’s fix it. 

1. Give in to your greasy cravings

So you woke up in bed this morning, shoes still on your feet, only half a memory of last night and now you only have three things in mind: eating, eating and… eating. Strangely, you’re not exactly craving a bowl of grated carrot salad. No, what your heart truly desires is a beautiful plate of grease. In which case, you may cave but on two conditions. One: if possible, schedule a day-time nap - there’s very little chance that you’ll be productive at work after a big night out and an enormous burger. Two: go for ‘high quality’ grease: Marcel’s eggs benedict for example (which we’re pretty sure were invented for exactly for this reason), a good Sunday roast at Floyd’s, a massive sandwich at Rachel’s, or a marvellous burger at Ruisseau.

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2. Let the ocean work its magic

It’s tested and approved. A punnet of oysters and a refreshing dip in the sea is a sure-fire way to wake you up and get you back on your feet. But you’re in Paris, so, unless you happen to own a private jet, let’s forget about the second part. A bit of seafood will do you good though: here are a few spots where you can gulp down oysters, slurp tasty fish soup, enjoy a perfect fish and chips, or get yourself back on track with some sushi.

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3. Believe in the miracle of ‘pho’

How does it work? Firstly because in your current state what you really need is hydration and nourishment, making this Vietnamese noodle broth the perfect solution. As well as being full of toxin-eliminating nutrients and spices, it has the added bonus of being filling, ideal for the morning after the night before if the ‘greasier’ option doesn’t appeal. But don’t take our word for it, try it for yourself: the proof is in the pudding – or the broth should we say.

Pho 14

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4. Fight (liquid) fire with (liquid) fire

In case of extreme sickness you’ll need an equally extreme cure. And, while we’re not suggesting you get black-out drunk again and pass out at the office, what you might need is a small drink when you wake up to get through the nastiest, early morning consequences of last night’s excesses. Does it really work? We’re not entirely sure. In any case, if you are going to side with the devil, it’s best to go for a Bloody Mary, a small beer or the famous French Rince-Cochon cocktail (lemon, gin, white wine and sparking water). Alternatively, hair of the dog Polish-style with vegetable broth, lemon, salt, Tabasco and vodka sounds… interesting. The choice is yours.

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Famous writers' tips and tricks

Ernest Hemingway: "Pour one jigger of absinthe into a Champagne glass. Add iced Champagne until it attains the proper opalescent milkiness. Drink three to five of these slowly."

Hunter Thompson: “My hangover cure: 12 amyl nitrites (one box), in conjunction with as many beers as necessary.”

Ready to get back on the booze?

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