Bangkok has mastered the double-take business name. You laugh, you question it, then walk in anyway. Behind these baffling shopfronts is some of the city’s best food, drinks and fashion.
A coffee stall in on its own innuendo. A restaurant built around contraception. A bar that poisons you on purpose. Yet none is a gimmick propping up a mediocre business: the food, drinks and ideas behind the names hold their own, making the joke land even harder.
Here are ten Bangkok spots proving a great name doesn’t have to make sense to work.
Yes, it’s stylised as ‘Cüm’ – pronounced ‘coohm’. Inside The Office coworking space in Thonglor, this coffee kiosk serves respectable specialty brews, from dark-roast Brazil Santos to lighter seasonal blends. Then comes the limited-run ‘Cum Drops’ menu, with flavours such as Yuzu Cum and Butter Cum. The tagline, ‘Thanks for cüming’, isn't exactly subtle either.
125/1 Soi Sukhumvit 63, Thong Lo, Khlong Tan Nuea, Watthana, Bangkok 10110. Daily, 8.30am-8pm
From the team behind Nashville hot chicken specialist Fowlmouth, this all-day breakfast joint is built around eggs. Crackhouse cracks them into breakfast burritos and serves them with tater tots, while the signature Crackgriddle swaps the buns of a McGriddle-inspired sandwich for two fluffy pancakes. What began as a bright-yellow kiosk at The Commons Saladaeng has expanded to The Commons Thonglor and, most recently, The Commons Cloud 11.
The Commons Saladaeng, Soi Saladaeng 1, Bang Rak, Bangkok. Sun-Wed 8am-10.30pm; Thu-Sat 8am-11pm.
This blunt instruction has been a Silom institution since 1998. Tucked down a side soi off Convent Road, Eat Me brings Asian ingredients to New American cooking – think mixed clams in fermented Thai sausage broth – across three floors with an in-house art gallery. It has ranked among Asia’s 50 Best Restaurants and, nearly three decades on, remains in the hands of founding siblings Darren and Shelley Hausler.
1/6 Soi Phiphat 2, Convent Rd, Silom. Daily 5pm-1am; Sunday brunch 11am-5pm.
The name refers less to actual poisoning than to a cocktail menu divided by strength into ‘poisons’ and ‘antidotes’. Once a three-nights-a-week Ekkamai speakeasy, Sugar Ray has since gone daily and moved into a sleek black-marble space inside Octo Seafood Bar on Sukhumvit 24. Track down the costumed doorman to find the entrance. Head mixologist Vipop ‘Tor’ Jinaphan works Thai flavours into classic cocktail forms, with pandan, Bengal spiced tea and ginseng-infused gin among the ingredients.
Octo Seafood Bar, Sukhumvit Soi 24, Khlong Toei, Bangkok. Daily 7pm-2am.
This Silom flagship owes its name to a chance exchange at a Berlin party. Asked where they were from, its founders answered ‘Bangkok’; the reply – ‘I wanna Bangkok’ – stuck. The offbeat streak continues inside, where past collections have featured a golden three-breasted alien goddess sculpture, tattoo-artist-designed tank tops and jewellery fashioned from repurposed Nintendo DS cartridges.
42 Naratiwas Ratchanakarin Rd, Silom, Bang Rak, Bangkok 10500. Mon-Fri noon-8pm; Sat-Sun 2pm-8pm.
Founded by Mechai Viravaidya – aka ‘Mr Condom’ – this restaurant grew out of a birth-control awareness campaign. The name is entirely literal: Mechai wanted contraceptives to be as commonplace as vegetables. Its tongue-in-cheek bio promises, ‘Our food is guaranteed not to cause pregnancy’. Condoms appear everywhere, from lampshades to mannequin outfits, and diners receive one with the bill instead of an after-dinner mint. Profits support the Population and Community Development Association’s family planning and HIV-prevention work.
10 Sukhumvit Soi 12, Khlong Toei, Bangkok 10110. Daily 11am-11pm.
A recent arrival on the Convent Road strip, Daddy Don’t Know takes its name from a confession: the owner opened the gelateria without telling their father. The mischief continues across a menu of flavours rotated every two weeks, including Naughty Habibi (Dubai-style dark chocolate), Kyoto Hentai (matcha and yuzu) and the whiskey-heavy Daddy Day Drunk. Made fresh daily, the gelato holds its own beyond the branding’s shock value.
2/3 Convent Rd, Silom, Bang Rak, Bangkok. Daily 11am-10pm.
One of Bangkok’s original vegan restaurants, Broccoli Revolution has served a wide-ranging plant-based menu since 2015, spanning quinoa burgers, Thai curries and cold-pressed juices. Social conscience is as central to the brand as vegetables, with proceeds donated to support at-risk young people in Thailand.
899 Sukhumvit Rd, Soi 49, Khlong Tan Nuea, Watthana, Bangkok 10110. Daily 9am-10pm.
A cheerfully self-deprecating name for a creative home-style kitchen in Meng Jai, Huai Khwang, serving Thai-meets-international dishes alongside good coffee and craft beer. The tagline – ‘Hang out til' we've belly again’ – captures the intended pace of an evening here: slow, indulgent and unbothered.
Soi Ratchada Niwet 9, Huai Khwang, Bangkok. Tue–Fri 4pm–midnight; Sat–Sun 12.30pm–midnight; closed Mon.
By day, this is a quiet Chinatown coffee shop. By night, it becomes a fully committed witchcraft-themed cocktail bar hidden behind a spooky bookshop-style frontage. Inside, an upside-down tree hangs from the ceiling, drinks are chosen from spellbook menus and a hidden dungeon lurks downstairs – gothic décor meets Harry Potter energy, without a hint of irony. The mood is set before you enter: its Instagram bio asks, ‘Who knows why we were taught to fear the witches and not those who burned them alive?’
412 Wanich 1 Rd, Chakkrawat, Samphanthawong, Bangkok 10100. Coffee 7am-4pm; bar 6pm-1am, daily.
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