They say five minutes can feel like five hours with the wrong person or disappear in a blink when the spark is real. For me, five minutes felt like a cocktail of both. That was my gay speed dating experience in Bangkok. In a city bursting with rainbow flags and rooftop bars, you’d think finding a date would be as easy as ordering another gin and tonic in Silom. But between the mixed signals, missed connections and men who ‘aren’t really looking for anything serious,’ I started to wonder: was modern love just a numbers game, or was I playing the wrong one?
For someone who’s never had a serious relationship in life, this felt like a better bet than endlessly swiping left and right or doing what I like to call ‘online men shopping’, where the only real interaction is exchanging the same tired small talk over and over. It was around then that I had a thought: maybe it’s time to step out of my room and my curated online persona and actually connect with people. Real people. Even if it was just for a drink, a laugh and maybe a new friendship.
That’s when I found out about OMG Matchmaking, host of monthly speed dating events for everyone – straight, queer, questioning or ‘it’s complicated.’ For once, love didn’t feel algorithmic. It felt possible. So, what really goes down at one of these modern-day love roulette nights? Let me spill.
Setting the scene
Before the flirty glances and five-minute sparks, there was the less glamorous part: filling out an online form. I bought my ticket to the event online and was promptly asked to submit a few crucial details – things that would apparently help ‘match’ me with potential soulmates. From your position (yes, that one) to a cheeky little bio, it all ends up on your date sheet. So my advice? Be honest, be a little silly, and maybe throw in something that doubles as a conversation starter. Because nothing says romance like seeing your own words printed on a spreadsheet while a stranger scans them with a cocktail in hand.
The event was held at SO/ Bangkok. As I arrived, I checked in with the staff, who handed me a name tag marked with my name, my group and my starting table. I also received a printed sheet with the full event agenda and a list of 17 eligible bachelors, complete with bios. Yes, it was giving gay LinkedIn but sexier. The scene was set with moody lighting and just the right touch of red glow, plush couches perfect for small talk, and a scent in the air that I can only describe as… lustful. The room was buzzing over 70 guests, from three groups: gays, bears and sapphics. Yet, somehow, the space never felt too packed. It was curated chaos in the best way.
Most of the guys were working professionals – some Thai, some expats, and a few surprise guests who were just in town on vacation (because apparently, even tourists want a taste of Bangkok romance). The crowd mostly ranged from late twenties to early thirties, with a few around my age which, let’s just say, made things interesting. To break the ice, we were all treated to a welcome drink from the lounge – a special Pride-themed menu just for the night. Naturally, I went for the one called ‘Cheer’, suddenly I was hot to go.
Let the games begin
Before the bell rang and the mingling began, the MC walked us through the rules of engagement step by step. In my group, we were labeled as Team A, which was then split into A1 and A2. A1s were bottoms and vers-bottoms (the table-sitters). A2s were tops and vers-tops (the designated movers) . As someone in A2, I had to slide from table to table. It was slightly confusing at first (nothing new there), but thankfully, the staff were lovely and helped guide us. Then the magic started, my first date was a guy listed as number 13. The conversation went like: ‘Is this your first time?’, ‘What do you do?’, ‘What are you looking for?’ and ‘What do you like to do?’ Now, normally I’d roll my eyes at these app-style questions. But in person, with a drink in hand and a real face across from you, it felt different. Warmer. More human. Every guy had a story or at the very least, a surprising hobby. Some were on their second or third event, still searching for the one. One even told me his friend met someone at a speed dating night back in their home country and ended up marrying him.
As the night unfolded, I found a few guys I shared mutual interest with. Those convos flowed like a good Negroni, and so did the eye contact. With some, five minutes felt like five hours. With others, five minutes felt like five seconds and I didn’t want the bell to ring. After each round, if you liked the person, you simply ticked a little box next to their name on your sheet. Simple, efficient, slightly nerve-wracking. Talking to 17 people in a row? Let’s just say my throat needed a lozenge and a nap. Luckily, there was a 15-minute halftime break for drinks, bathroom runs, and breathing. The second half of the night was a little less flow, I’ll admit. The rhythm slowed down and small talk fatigue kicked in but hey, that’s dating.
Close the scene
Once all rounds were done, we handed in our sheets. That was our moment of truth, who did we like? Afterward, the event shifted into a mini afterparty. Some people kept chatting and swapping contacts, others formed little cliques and planned a club night, while a few quietly slipped out the door.
One thing I did wish was that we should get a chance to talk to people from the other teams; some of them looked very promising. But unfortunately, Cupid only had so many arrows to shoot that night. Still, I walked away with something valuable: new friends, fresh perspectives and real conversations about life and love in this big, wild city.
The next day, the results landed in my email inbox. I had picked six people, and five of them matched with me – not bad for a first-timer. Along with the results came their names and contact info. The rest was up to you. A quick message. A coffee meet-up. Maybe even something more.
My pro tips
Smile, be open, don’t go in expecting fireworks but stay ready for a connection. Even if romance doesn’t bloom, friendship often does. And honestly, that’s already a win.
So, if you’re tired of ghosting, swiping or just too shy to strike up a conversation at the bar, OMG Matchmaking’s speed dating might just be the refresh button your love life needs. Check their website for upcoming sessions because sometimes all it takes is five minutes and a little red light to change everything.