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The Smiths are playing Wireless festival on Sunday

The Smiths (Jaden and Willow)
© Christopher Halloran / Shutterstock.com

The Smiths?!
No, not them. We’re talking about Willow and Jaden Smith: daughter and son of Will Smith and Jada Pinkett-Smith. Any confusion with the Manchester band is purely accidental.

Yeah, right. So why devote precious blog space to these celebri-kids?
Because not only are Jaden and Willow playing a set together at Wireless this Sunday, they’re also  – despite being 16 and 13 respectively – becoming as quotable as Morrissey.

Really? How?
Well, in tweets and interviews the pair have shown a curious affinity for vague, pseudo-psychological statements and insights that reveal staggering self-belief. Maybe it’s a product of having a dad who plays heroic leads in movies, but they are remarkably sure of themselves.

But surely all teens are slightly precocious?
True, but Willow believes that she can actually control time (‘I can make it go slow or fast… and that’s how I know it doesn’t exist’). She also thinks that the powers-that-be are force-feeding her chips: ‘We all need to learn how to harmoniously live on this planet without frying it like those systematic French fries the government feeds us.’

Oookay… What about Jaden?
Well, he’s possibly even more intergalactic of mind. Try these Jaden-isms: ‘When you think about an apple, you also think about the opposite of an apple.’ ‘There’s a theoretical physicist inside all of our minds.’ ‘How can mirrors be real if our eyes aren’t real?’

All right, they’re a bit bonkers – but so are lots of child stars. What difference does it make?
It makes none, really – except that it detracts somewhat from their music, which is surprisingly decent. Though most will know Willow from the sugary pop of ‘Whip My Hair’, the pair actually trade in woozy, mellow, soulful R&B duets that are a world away from the ‘Fresh Prince’ theme. Anyway, most musicians are a bit mad. Let’s just hope the Smiths channel their cosmic powers wisely.

See the rest of the line-up and book tickets for Wireless festival, and read the 20 best Drake songs.

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