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Mon 20
The Simpsons Thanksgiving Bingo Videology Bar & Cinema
Before this country’s definitive holiday, spend time with its most iconic family, when Videology airs holiday-themed episodes of the seminal series, like “Bart vs. Thanksgiving” and “Homer the Heretic.” Call out enough of the show’s catchphrases, like “D’oh!,” to win a free drink and eternal bragging rights.
Anna & Patti Do Comedy for a Mouse Union Hall; 8pm; $6, at the door $8
Upsettingly funny stand-up buddies Patti Harrison and Anna Drezen go all out with committed stand-up sets to honor and please an inanimate mouse doll called Master Mouse. Lorelai Ramirez and Jes Tom join in on the bonkers proceedings, with Joel Kim Booster officiating. Beware.
Mondays in the Club with Lance Club Cumming; 8:30pm; free
He’s worked with Liza Minnelli, Kylie Minogue and just about every downtown act in NYC. Now composer, pianist and performer Lance Horne hosts his own wild night of singing, drinking and dancing at the newly opened nightlife hub Club Cumming. Expect appearances by Broadway stars looking to get down by the piano.
Tue 21
Golden Lady Burlesque Sid Gold’s Request Room; 8:30pm; $5–$20
At this monthly gathering, burlesque performer extraordinaire Essence Revealed welcomes strip-teasing pros to the stage for a boozy night of dancing and singing by the piano.
Thanksgiving Recital: A Comedy Central Corporate Retreat UCBEast; 7:30pm; $7
At this sure-to-be-bananas edition of Comedy Central’s monthly UCB showcase, surrealistic comedy savant Patti Harrison hosts an hour of hilarious, vaguely upsetting original Turkey Day songs, with the help of her sister stage Gorgons Catherine Cohen and Mitra Jouhari. You’ll learn some perfectly inappropriate bops to teach your younger relatives.
Judy Collins: A Love Letter to Stephen Sondheim Joe’s Pub at the Public Theater; 7pm; $40–$75 plus $12 minimum
A folk-pop icon since the ’60s, Collins sings with a radiant decency that verges on holiness, and uses her voice like a fine crystal vessel: to elevate and beautify but also to expose. In her Joe's Pub engagement, she explores the rich catalog of Stephen Sondheim, whose "Send in the Clowns" she made into an unlikely popular hit in 1975.
Salty Brine: Welcome to the Jungle Pangea; 7:30pm; $20–$25, plus $20 minimum
The outré actor-writer continues his terrific Spectacular Living Record Collection Cabaret series, in which he weaves classic pop albums into funny, perceptive tapestries of queer storytelling. This edition somehow mashes Harry Nilsson's Nilsson Schmilsson with Rudyard Kipling's The Jungle Book.
Katherine McPhee: I Fall in Love Too Easily Cafe Carlyle; 8:45pm; $75–$150, plus $25–$75 minimum
Following in the footsteps of her Smash costar Megan Hilty, American Idol finalist turned love/hate–watch phenomenon McPhee spends a week the city's swankiest cabaret boîte with a collection of jazz standards, tied to the release of her fifth album. Catch the McPheever!
Joey Arias Joe’s Pub at the Public Theater; 9:30pm; $25, plus $12 minimum
A demigod of the demimonde, Arias has entertained and scandalized the club world for decades with his fetish-drag getups, extravagant charisma, filthy patter and Billie Holiday stylings. In his latest Joe's set, he looks back on his storied career with help from Charly Zastrau at the piano.
Wed 22
Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade Balloon Inflation American Museum of Natural History; 3pm; free
This pre–Turkey Day ritual, held near the American Museum of Natural History, has become almost as crowded as the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade, but we prefer it to the main event. Why? We prefer to weave through the crowds, walking past the inflation stations to see SongeBob SquarePants at our own pace. Inflation takes place from 3 to 10pm. Arrive later in the evening, when the gigantic characters have taken shape; the crowds are at their peak, so you can also show off the famed New York sidewalk shuffle. Enter at W 79th St at Columbus Ave.
Amateur Night at the Apollo Apollo Theater; 7:30pm; $25–$43
This talent-packed event is one of the top highlights of Harlem Week, featuring aspiring singers, musicians, rappers, dancers and spoken word artists doing their best to convince audiences to make them Apollo legends. Your cheers (or boos) will decide who receives the night’s biggest honor—Top Dog—along with a cash prize of $20,000. Consider this your chance to see legends in the making before they become household names.
Thank You for Everything: Thanksgiving Edition House of Yes; 10pm; before 11pm free, after $10–$20
Brooklyn disco palace House of Yes expresses gratitude to its regular revelers with a night of jubilant dancing, circus acts and psychedelia. You’re guaranteed an endorphin rush that will see you through all the emotional ups and downs of your family reunion.
Nicky Siano’s Native New Yorker Thanksgiving Eve Good Room; 10pm; $10–$20
For those hotheads who can’t keep still, this legendary rager promises to deliver a volcano of sexual and social dynamism. Join the “master of disco soul” Nicky Siano—whose DJ résumé includes Studio 54 and the Gallery—and host Rebecca Lynn at Good Room for hard beats and sweaty dancing. As if that weren't enough, Justin Strauss and Billy Caldwell serve up the best in disco and dance music in the Bad Room.
Kamasi Washington Terminal 5; 8pm; $35–$40
Saxophonist, bandleader and Kendrick Lamar collaborator Washington reinvigorated contemporary jazz and garnered heaps of mainstream critical acclaim with his ambitious three-hour 2015 debut, The Epic. He takes the stage behind a new EP, Harmony of Difference.
Amateur Night: Super Top Dog Apollo Theater; 7:30pm; $20–$40
It's the contest the entire season has been leading up to: The weekly Amateur Night series at the Apollo culminates with Super Top Dog, giving hopefuls a crack at the $5,000 in the child category and a whopping $20,000 in the adult category. The best of the season will bring their wildest stunts, songs and surprises, and the audience will be more merciless than ever. Brace yourself!
Stay in School Starr Bar; 8pm; free
Eternal hustler Tyler Richardson invites some of his favorite stand-ups to throw down on Thanksgiving eve. Catch killer sets from Evan Williams, Jim Tews, Petey DeAbreu, Michael Kaplan, Matt Wayne, David Agyekum, Usama Siddiquee and Farah Brook at this charming night of comedy.
Thu 23
Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade at various locations; 9am; free
Bundle up, kids. Once again, the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade heralds the holiday season with familiar sights like giant balloons, high-kicking Rockettes and Santa’s sleigh, plus celebrity appearances. The parade begins at W 77th St and Central Park West and treks down to Herald Square.
Prospect Park Track Club Turkey Trot Prospect Park, Nethermead; 9am; $35, $40
Preemptively burn off a few pounds (just as you're about bound to gain some extra weight) by running through the verdant foliage of Prospect Park. If you can race to be the top of the pack at this 5K, you win a pie. What more incentive does a runner need on Thanksgiving Day?
Thanksgiving Day: Clue on a Loop with Brandy and Board Games Videology Bar & Cinema; 4pm; free
If the tryptophan doesn’t put you under, head to Williamsburg’s cinema-meets-bar to spend Thanksgiving evening immersed in everyone’s favorite whodunit. Sidle up to a board game or kick back with a slice of pumpkin pie and a nightcap from the evening’s special brandy menu. The camp classic runs continuously from 4pm to 1am, so if you don’t know all of the lines already, you will by the night’s end.
Laugh It Off Comedy Village Lantern; 7:45pm; free
If you're fed up with familial turkey day obligations, escape to the Village Lantern for a night of free stand-up from excellent New York comedians.