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Cheer up, Knicks—here's how to forget about those 50 losses

Will Gleason

New York can be a pretty tough place to live. Sometimes you can’t figure out how to make rent. Sometimes arctic air hovers over the region for months at a time turning the West Side Highway into an apocalyptic wasteland. And sometimes, your basketball team is the first one in your league to lose 50 games. While also being just 11 losses away from setting a record for the worst 82-game record in NBA history. And your coach is making you meditate.

The New York Knicks are not having the best year. But just because you have the worst record in the NBA, does not mean you need to sit around and mope about it all day. Here are a few New York activities that will be sure to cheer up NYC’s home team in no time.

Draw personal strength from Helen Mirren If Queen Elizabeth II can keep it together facing off against Prime Ministers for over half a century in The Audience, you can definitely handle going up against the Utah Jazz tonight.

Get tattoos Head to New York Adorned on 2nd Avenue to get some new tats and body piercings. Nothing says, “I’m wallowing” like a new tragus ring.

Play a game of horse Carousel horse, that is. A few spins around Jane’s Carousel in DUMBO should definitely re-open your eyes to the beauty of life and why today is about living in the present.

Treat yourself at Big Gay Ice Cream Get a cone with the works—including the injected peanut butter—to eat some serious feelings.

Sing the pain away Drown your sorrows in some seriously sad show tunes at Marie’s Crisis. ‘Melo can lead the team in a rousing rendition of “Don’t Cry Out Loud.” There won’t be a dry eye in the house.

Snag a free macaron You know what's better than a delicious French pastry? A delicious French pastry that's completely free. Try feeling depressed after popping one of these guys in your mouth. The Denver Nuggets won't be able to take that away from you.


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