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NYPD tells people not to be afraid of Scary Clowns

Suicide Squad
Suicide Squad

Patch Adams. Crazy Joe Davola. Jared LetoDonald Trump. How many truly awful clowns can this nation be responsible for? If the hilarity weren't already over, it certainly is now: real-life, circus-free clowns have been spotted lurking in woods and public spaces all over the country, with reports of a sword-wielding "jester" chasing a child in Phillipsburg, New Jersey last week and creepy sightings in Long Island. 

And while some of these goons are inevitably non-violent posers on some trite mission stir chaos in an a politically corrected America (as if they could ever crush it like Heath Ledger), others are raising concerns. Hudson Valley police are investigating an "incident" connected to images of a man in an orange wig holding a rifle.

So where does that leave New Yorkers whose goodwill towards painted freaks starts and ends with Margot Robbie? According to NYPD deputy commissioner for Counterterrorism and Intelligence John Miller, we shouldn't be too worried. At a press conference yesterday, Miller said that the NYPD were "tracking it, but we don't see any real threat here." Apparently, much of the online threats are just that... threats. He said that his department has "tried to avoid falling into the trap of putting extra police protection" out for what usually amounts to be lame scares. 

So for now, New Yorkers can drop the clown anxiety and just focus on fear of terrorist attacks, an inevitable underwater future, evolving bacteria in the subway, a fascist president, gentrification and more Minions movies. So that shouldn't be too hard. If you're looking for one clown to love, at least there's Julie Klausner: 

 

 

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