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Maybe it's the studio's proximity to the Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree or the glee emanating off a cast about to get a few deserved weeks of vacation, but there's something truly special about Saturday Night Live around the holidays. The hosts are that much jollier, the musical guests just a touch more epic—this weekend's holiday episode sees the return of beloved SNL vets Amy Poehler and Tina Fey (!!) and a boss performance by Bruce Springsteen (!!!), for crying out loud.
And if that's not enough to jingle your bells, just think of the holiday-themed skits in our near future. (The show's recent windswept Thanksgiving short was on point—the cure to all of your family's problems, or any problem really, is Adele.) To get you prepped, let's take a trip down SNL memory lane with the best holiday sketches and shorts of all time. And yes, more than one involves genitalia.
12. Santa's My Boyfriend
This St. Nick-loving opening number turns from nice to naughty real quick. Sample lyric: "I can't wait for the time when he'll truly be mine, and leave his bitch of a wife."
11. Give it on up to Homelessville
Come for Justin Timberlake breaking it down in a giant soup costume to Salt-N-Pepa; stay for Will Forte's angelic falsetto.
10. Motivational Santa
If anyone could scare children out of acting naughty, it's Chris Farley's rant-bellowing, van-dwelling Matt Foley in a Santa suit.
9. It's a Wonderful Life: The Lost Ending
We watch the 1946 Frank Capra classic every year. For some reason, though, we don't remember it featuring this many body slams.
8. (Do It On My) Twin Bed
This 2013 digital short–turned–holiday hook-up anthem gets extra points for a Jonathan Taylor Thomas reference, Jimmy Fallon's pubescent mustache and introducing the world to the majesty that is 'Lil Baby Aidy.
7. Steve Martin's Holiday Wish
The comedy legend wishes for harmony and peace, tax-free millions, a month-long orgasm and revenge against his enemies—but not necessarily in that order.
6. Christmas for the Jews
There are few things more festively magical than Darlene Love's powerhouse voice caroling about "circumcising grateful squirrels," drinking "sweet-ass wine" and seeing "'Fiddler on the Roof' with actual Jewish actors."
5. I Wish It Was Christmas Today
There's no real joke here—just the sheer joy of watching 2000-era Horatio Sanz, Jimmy Fallon, Chris Cattan and Tracy Morgan goof off in ugly pullover sweaters. A little weird, and a whole lot of wonderful.
4. Glengarry Glen-Christmas
Equally smart and silly, it's Glengarry Glen Ross, but with less Pacino and more elf puns. Always. Be. Cobbling.
3. The Chanukah Song
Adam Sandler's 1994 Weekend Update spot has become a real-deal, time-honored ode to the Festival of Lights and all the chosen people (Arthur Fonzarelli, Captain Kirk, et al.) who celebrate it. Take that, "I Have a Little Dreidel."
2. Dick in a Box
Fun fact: Justin Timberlake's gift-wrapped junk won an Emmy in 2007 for "Best Original Music and Lyrics." We really can't blame the Television Academy.
1. NPR's Delicious Dish: Schweddy Balls
How Ana Gasteyer, Molly Shannon and Alec Baldwin didn't break once during this 1998 Christmas gem is astounding, because it's been giving us a mean case of the church giggles for nearly two decades.