Get us in your inbox


What should the Brooklyn Bridge flag really be?

By Ned Hepburn

In Wednesday's The Curious Case Of The White Flag On The Brooklyn Bridge it appeared that the culprit was a bunch of skaters who thought it would be "mad punk rock #YOLO" to put bleached white flags on top of the Brooklyn Bridge. Some people thought it was a bomb threat. Others thought it had something to do with the moon landing. Others still thought it had something to do with 84 year old artist Jasper Johns, perhaps up to his old hijinks (probably). They were all wrong: it was actually just a bunch of skate punks

But it begs the questions: what should Brooklyn's flag actually be? 

  • A trust fund check being held by two backyard chickens.
  • The phrase "#ugh" in Comic Sans font. 
  • One of the de Blasio kids.
  • The Chipotle logo.
  • This: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
  • A Sriracha hot sauce bottle on top of a coffee table book about hot sauce. 
  • A picture of your last girlfriend/boyfriend mid disappointed sigh.
  • A guy with an asymmetrical haircut not looking at the camera, wistfully.
  • Hats.
  • Whatever Lena Dunham wants, because, like, people like that shit? 
  • A guy in a wifebeater with thick eyebrows looking grumpy. 
  • The AirBnB logo that looks like a vagina.
  • A homeless guy giving you the thumbs up. Hey, alright!
  • The first 3 seconds of The Simpsons theme song but on a flag.
  • Something about gentrification, probably. 
  • The face of an art college student the very second they realize that the world is a difficult place and that you can't pay for your groceries with a conceptual diorama.
  • An advertisement for the new season of GIRLS, Sundays at 10pm on HBO!
  • Eyerolling.
  • A stroller.
  • A stroller pushing another smaller stroller. 
  • A stroller pushing another smaller stroller with a baby stroller inside the second stroller. 
  • A guy not knowing how to pronounce "Gowanus." 
  • Whatever comes up when you google the word "twee."
  • Zooey Deschanel, but, like, with tattoos.  
  • The real Brooklyn flag, but with the ability to swipe left or right. 
  • Pizza.

Popular on Time Out

    Latest news

      Read next