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10 perks of wearing a mask all the time in NYC

The unexpected upsides to our new mask-filled lives.

By
Will Gleason
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There’s been a lot of rough developments for New Yorkers over the last year. But that doesn’t mean that all the changes to the city are bad! For instance: You may be using the subway less, but you’re probably walking and biking a lot more! And yeah, we may be banned from traveling to a majority of countries around the world, but at least we’ve had more time to explore the tri-state area. Who knew Connecticut had such nice beaches?

Visibly, one of the most noticeable changes to the cityscape has been the proliferation of face masks. And while the newly mandatory accessories do have some downsides, namely uneven face tans, foggy glasses and very sore ears, they also have some perks! These are, of course, on top of the main perk, which remains lessening your chance of contracting or spreading a potentially lethal disease. But you probably already know that one.

So the next time you’re about to leave your apartment and feel a slight twinge of annoyance while reaching for that small piece of cloth to cover your mouth and nose, just think of these 10 upsides to our new mask-filled lives.

1. Polite smiles are a thing of the past. Don’t feel like smiling at your bodega guy or flashing your pearly whites at your super while passing them in the hall? Now, you don’t have to! Also, randos on the street have one less thing to yell.

2. Everyone kind of looks like a superhero now. Gotham has always been a very thinly disguised stand-in for New York, but now we all look like we’re in a comic book. After five minutes of watching the local news, you expect the Riddler to pop up.

3. Chin acne is basically non-existent. Here’s a philosophical question: If you have a pimple on your chin, but it’s covered by a face mask, does it even exist? The answer is no. It doesn’t!

4. Finally, your eyes are the star of the show! Many years ago, model, television personality and cultural prophet Tyra Banks taught us all to smize. Now, all those years spent squinting at our bathroom mirrors have finally paid off.

5. Summer smells are 20 percent less intense. We’ve all become accustomed to the lively aromas of New York in summer. But now, we can experience them in a slightly muted manner. (Pro tip: Spritz your mask with your favorite fragrance!)

6. You can get creative with interior design. The new motto whenever leaving your apartment is: “Wallet, keys, phone, mask.” While a doorside spot for keys and change was already common, we now get to design fun face mask hooks.

7. You never have to wear lipstick. So you can save some money on that for the next year if you want.

8. You have another way of expressing yourself! Why settle for a boring old plain mask when you can sport the logo of your favorite team or designer or even a photo of the lower half of your face on top of the lower half of your face? The sky’s the limit! (And you can support local designers while you're at it!)

9. Random air conditioner fluid never drips into your mouth while you're walking down the street. This happened to me once, and I’ve never been the same. You may try to convince yourself that it was raining... but you know in your heart of hearts that it wasn’t rain. It definitely wasn’t rain.

10. You can feel good knowing you’re doing your part to keep your fellow New Yorkers healthy and safe. This is definitely the best perk of them all.

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