Need help checking off your holiday shopping list? The MTA totally has you covered—from a shopping standpoint, at least. In the spirit of gift-giving, our transit system has so generously decided to sell not-so-gently used paraphernalia taken from buses and subway cars.
You can check out the full list of items (and their very New York price points) here. But we’ve highlighted a few of our favorite MTA collectibles below. Spoiler alert: None of the items include a realistic L train construction plan, cheaper MetroCard fares or reliable train service, any of which would be a Christmas miracle.
Wooden Subway Bench: $650
Who wants to watch Netflix on a soft, cozy couch when you can plop down on this rustic, underground bench? (Bed bugs don’t like wood, right?)
Grabholds & Stanchion poles: $25
Let’s just hope they give these poles a good scrubbing (and some serious disinfecting) before delivery.
Two bus passenger seats: $500
The MTA claims these seats are plush. (After years of use, how can they not be?) And pondering what that brown stain is on the left seat cushion is just part of the fun!
Reuse Canister: $300
No gift sums up 2017 better than this “authentic” New York trash can, which probably still has “authentic” vomit, urine and other mysterious liquid stains on it.