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‘Tonteria’ means ‘nonsense’ in Spanish, and this Mexican-themed Sloaney hangout has silliness in spades: think fire-eating women in latex, live lucha libre wrestling and booze poured from a miniature Mayan ziggurat. If that’s not ‘loco’ enough for you, there is even a toy train to deliver shots to your table. Yeah. In one of Guy Pelly’s stable of west London bars, the clientele are predictably well-heeled (legend has it Prince Harry uses his own secret entrance), but there is delicious tapas and it’s a prime spot to mingle with the high-born and high-cheekboned. To blend in you may as well quaff a champagne cocktail: the Tonte Spritz’s heady fusion of sweet and citrus will have you merry from the initial sip, while the frozen margarita is deceptively drinkable while packing a serious punch. Special mention to the stonking tequila selection, most notably the Reserva de Alma, one of only two bottles of its kind in the world and a snip at £5,000. ¡Ay caramba!
7-12 Sloane Square
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