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Six ridiculous novelty cocktails that seemed like a good idea at the time

Out on the town? Bored of the same old same-old? Time to grab yourself a glassful of something weird and exciting. But not these. Anything but these.

The one with energy drink in it


What you were thinking at the time ‘It’s 1am. Time to either crash out or kick things up a notch. Ugh, Uber’s on surge pricing? TWELVE JÄGERBOMBS PLEASE BARKEEP.’

What you’ll be thinking when you sober up: ‘How come my teeth hurt so much? How come my head hurts so much? How come my shoes are so sticky? How come my heart is doing the Macarena?’

 

The one that’s on fire

 

A photo posted by Island Bar (@islandbaruk) on


What you were thinking at the time ‘The lads are going to think this is fucking HILARIOUS. Hey lads! Lads! LADS! Watch this!’

What you’ll be thinking when you sober up ‘Okay, where the hell did my eyebrows go?’

The hilariously disgusting shot that almost definitely has Bailey’s in it

 

A photo posted by TIPSY BARTENDER (@tipsybartender) on


What you were thinking at the time ‘Okay, I’m sort of losing the group here – time to order a round of the most unpalatable, curdle-prone drink possible and hope it makes everyone stops talking about sodding “Game of Thrones”.’

What you’ll be thinking when you sober up ‘Looks like I’ll be taking that trip to Westeros after all, with a deeply unsettling sensation in my belly.’

The novelty bloody mary

 

A photo posted by @bloodymaryaddict on


What you were thinking at the time ‘Restorative booze and basically a full meal, all in one. So long, hangover.’

What you’ll be thinking when you sober up ‘Indigestion AND a headache? Yep, that £20 probably would’ve been better spent on an actual fry-up. And a coffee.’

The one topped with gold leaf

 

A photo posted by lebanonblonde (@lebanonblonde) on


What you were thinking at the time ‘This date’s not going so well – time to demonstrate how wealthy I am by ordering a depressingly expensive and ostentatious drink topped with a sprinkling of precious metal.’

What you’ll be thinking when you sober up ‘Okay, either someone’s cloned my card or I’ll be heading to Wetherspoons for next week’s date. To drink tap water.’

The one that’s literally snakebite

 

A photo posted by James Barty (@jabarty87) on


What you were thinking at the time ‘Beer or cider? Beer… or cider? I’m too drunk to decide. Let’s go for BOTH. Make it purple? Sure, why the hell not.’

What you’ll be thinking when you sober up ‘Think I’m gonna vom… BLEEURRRGGGHHHHH! Hang on, I don’t remember eating loads of beetroot last night…’

Check out our full guide to cocktails in London

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