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Someone left a seriously passive aggressive note on a badly parked car in Clapham

By
Isabelle Aron
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Annie Copus/Shit London

What should you do when someone's parked their car across your driveway?

A) Accept defeat and get the bus

B) 'Accidentally' scratch their car with your key

C) Leave a note with a passive aggressive questionnaire

Ben Ashwell, who lives in Clapham, faced this exact conundrum after his car was blocked in thanks to an 'inconsiderate' driver. He opted for option C, and left this excellent 'questionnaire' on the offending car. He starts off by addressing the motorist as 'Inconsiderate neighbour/Clapham weekend reveller/Stevie Wonder', before asking why they parked across the driveway, with three possible options and even a handy tick box. 

Ashwell may have reported the motorist to the police and council (as he conveniently points out in the note), but he's not bitter, no way. He's even offering £10,000 (tax free) or a complimentary dinner for two for the lucky person who fills in his questionnaire. Although the bottom of the note is illegible thanks to the rain so this may or may not be a genuine offer (it's definitely not).

Meanwhile, a pub in Herne Hill has shared its barred-for-life list.

And here are 25 things you (probably) didn't know about the London Underground.

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