'What's that? You haven't finished your Christmas shopping yet? But there are only 100 days to go until the big day, people, ONE HUNDRED DAYS!'
Okay, chill out mate, we all like a mince pie, but there's no need to bang on about your baubles just yet. A hundred days is a long time and there are some pretty serious celebrations coming up between now and December (Halloween parties and Bonfire Night displays spring to mind, and they're just for starters). What would be just lovely is if you could keep the C-word under wraps for just a little while longer, so we can get back to enjoying the here and now, the present if you will – no, not that type of present – because next thing you know it'll be the start of 2017 and we'll be counting down the days until the next herd of reindeer.
For those of a more merry disposition, don't worry, we're just being grinches – here's a flurry of features to (yule)tide you over until we get in the Christmas spirit:
The best Christmas theatre shows coming to London
Sparkling Christmas lights of London past
And our big, festive guide to Christmas in London 2016
'Can I get a ho, ho, ho?!' No, you most certainly may not.