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‘A guy on Tinder wanted to sniff my bum. I feel quite flattered that a guy wants to stick his nose there.’
‘In our orchestra there was one incredibly fit bassoon player.’
‘I’m so glad I’m not in crypto right now.’
‘Also, I’ve just woken up with an Australian geologist’s business card.’
‘I’ll draw your eyebrows on, but I won’t go to Tesco’s with you.’
‘Think about it: helicopters aren’t that expensive.’
‘I’ve always wondered what beards look like underwater.’
‘Full stops make me nervous.’
‘I wish my husband was here – he has a real authority with flies.’
‘If babies matured as fast as dogs, I’d probably consider having one.’
Every week you share the weird things you’ve overheard in London. Above, a few perplexing snippets from the past seven days – don’t forget to tweet us your own!
Like Word on the Street? We’ve now made a book of these little beauties! ‘Word on the Street: Ridiculous Things We’ve Overheard in London’ is out now, £6.99. To buy a copy, visit timeout.com/wotsbook.