Festivals are breeding grounds for great stories - great gross stories. So we asked the cream of 2018's DJs, bands and performers to share their most heinous tales of festival grimness. Warning: some of these anecdotes are not for the faint of heart.
‘Someone collapsed on to a tent peg and it took their eye out.’ Barely Legal, who plays Forbidden Forest.
‘I’ve seen a chemical toilet tipped over with a girl inside it. It’s up there with medieval torture in my book.’ Vinny from Django Django, who play Beat-Herder.
‘Dougie saw a sanitation truck explode on two girls at Glastonbury. One screamed in terror, “It’s mud, it’s mud!” And the other stood silent for a second and then said “It’s. Not. Muuuuuud!”’ Fran from Travis, who play Isle of Wight.
‘Two friends who needed a number one really bad, but were too cold to leave the tent. So they decided to drink each other’s to avoid a wet tent.’ Clayton Wright from Little Gay Brother, pictured below.
‘Someone dragging their Segway through a dancefloor while I was playing at Burning Man and ask to plug it into the DJ booth.’ Felix Dickinson, who plays Love International.
‘Some lad got a tow rope from his car, tied it to his mate’s feet whilst he was sleeping in his tent and just drove really fast through the site with his mate attached.’ Saoirse, who plays Lovebox.
‘A lady squatting in front of my car. If you got to go, you got to go.’ Chris from Squeeze, who play British Summer Time.
'A man fell into the toilet pit at Sidmouth festival! A drunk man decided to pee into the pit rather than wait for a cubicle to be free. The combination of rain, mud and beer did not end in glory!’ Kate Rusby, pictured below, who curates Underneath the Stars.
‘Pissing my pants at Splendour in the Grass.’ Jordan Rakei, who plays Lost Village.
‘I saw someone wash their face in the urinal once.’ Jaguar Skills, who plays Bestival.
‘Probably a middle-aged woman sat naked on one of the stones at the Stone Circle, using the stone to sort of pleasure herself.’ Jonny Dub from LEVELZ.
‘A guy standing ankle deep in mud, covered in mud, wearing nothing but a condom.’ DJ Harvey, pictured below, who plays Art's House.
‘Mumford & Sons.’ Chimpo from LEVELZ.
‘Once saw a guy in Germany taking a poo on someone’s tent.’ You Me At Six, who play Community Festival.
‘I saw a couple both throw up into the mud then start snogging almost immediately afterwards. True love.’ Eclair Fifi, who plays Farr.
‘A person covered in shit.’ Sam Fender, who plays Citadel.
‘Saw someone eat a hot dog from a swamp of mud at Parklife before.’ Conducta, who plays Eastern Electrics.
‘Someone threw a cup of chewed-up, spat-out, chewing tobacco at the stage. IT WENT IN MY MOUTH.’ Ben from Asking Alexandria.