Hen do games and challenges

Start with a photograph of the groom, printed out at A4 size. The aim is for the hens to produce several new versions of it – every one more chronically dire than the last.

To kick off, collaborate on a combo portrait. Get each guest to roll dice to determine one part of the fiancé’s face that they must draw – 1 = left eye, 2 = mouth, 3 = nose, and so on – and what tool they must use: 1 = pencil; 2 = lipstick; 3 = finger paint, etc.

Next, every hen must individually sketch the pic. From memory. Whilst blindfolded.

Finally, everyone gets to copy the photo, with their eyes open… but whilst wearing rubber gloves filled with a ‘surprise substance’, that could be jelly, shaving foam, tinned spaghetti hoops, cornflakes...

Collect all the drawings together in a scrapbook as a gift for the bride: however much her betrothed grows crinkly and wrinkly as the years pass, at least he’ll never look as wonky as her did on her hen night. 

Split the hen party into two teams, and give each a box of Maltesers, Sellotape, and a pillowcase stuffed with cardboard tubes collected from the insides of loo rolls, gift wrap, tinfoil, kitchen towel, etc. 

Each group has to fix their tubes together into one giant ‘marble run’ as fast as they can, then take turns to roll a Malteser down it into a team mate’s mouth. The winners are the ones who finish their bag first. 

Remove all the contents from a box of tissues, cut a rectangular hole in the front about 5cm by 12cm, and fill the carton with ping pong balls. Affix ribbon or string to the back so you can tie the box snugly round someone’s waist, positioning it just over their bum.

Spin a bottle to determine which two hens go first. One plays ‘the bride’, and gets the carton tied around her arse; the other plays ‘the groom’. Whack on a song with a strong beat, turn up the volume, and cheer on ‘the bride’ as she twerks, jerks, winds, grinds, and shimmies her tush up against her lover, aiming to bounce the balls out of the box solely using the bombastic power of her gyrating buttocks. The dance ain’t done til all the balls are gone.

Take turns, awarding bonus points for creative flair, and make sure you video every whooping, hollering, shuddering, juddering second. 

Every hen writes a question for the bride on a slip of paper, then inserts it into a balloon along with a handful of confetti and glitter. Every guest’s balloon is then inflated using helium, and a childhood photo of them is attached with a ribbon, to create a cute floating gallery of the bride’s friends as toddlers and tiddlers.

The bride has to identify the kiddo in each snap, then pop the balloon with a pin – so sprinkles and twinkles explode everywhere – and answer the query inside.

So far, so sweet. Unless you make her inhale helium from the canister before giving her responses…

First of all, set a topic – for example, ‘stuff to pack for the honeymoon’, ‘swear words’ or ‘items associated with the bride/groom’ – and get everyone to list one relevant thing beginning with each letter of the alphabet. The first person to complete their list is the winner and becomes the ‘taped crusader’ who will collect prizes for the rest of the group.

Get the victor to stand with their hands by their sides, and wrap them from knee to shoulder in wide double-sided tape, or gaffer tape placed sticky-side out. Cover the floor with tiny, light novelties – condoms, wrapped sweets, face and hair masks in sachets – then get the crusader to roll around until there’s a gift for everyone glued to them. Up the ante by creating a ‘spousal snowdome’ at the same time, using electric fans to blow confetti around the room.

This one’s gloriously gross. Buy a load of dirt cheap thongs from Primark or a pound shop, or get every hen to bring along a (new) pair of knickers. Spread or sprinkle something with a strong flavour or scent on the gusset of each item of underwear: the groom’s trademark aftershave; peanut butter; Marmite; TCP, and so on. 

Blindfold the bride, and get her to sniff or nibble each crotch (while being photographed, natch) and guess what it smells or tastes of. If she’s wrong, she has to fulfil a forfeit written on a small piece of card and stapled to the label of the undies. 

Be sure to tell the stags you spent the evening licking one another’s lingerie…