Texas Joe’s is delightfully incongruous; an American BBQ smokehouse in the middle of the most Dickensian street in south London. The first sign that you’re not in Bermondsey anymore is the gleaming 1962 Cadillac Coupe DeVille parked on the Victorian cobbles outside. It’s the kind of classic motor you rarely see in the States, let alone London Bridge. The smokehouse itself is clad in coal-black clapper-board in tribute to true Texan roadside joints Kreuz’s, Snow’s and Black’s.
Our fiesta of BBQ starts with perfectly pink pork ribs
Inside draws you deeper into the kind of old-school Americana that’ll have you humming honky tonk hits before your denim-clad hiney even hits the seat. The walls are covered in vintage Willie Nelson’s 4th of July Picnic posters, proper Mexican sombreros and a giant painting of John Wayne. And that’s before we even mention the two-metre long dive bar diorama. It’s a hoarder's paradise, or, if you’d rather, an episode of American Pickers come to glorious life.
The master of ceremonies is Texas Joe himself, who walks around like he owns the place (probably because he does) in an embroidered, Nudie-style western get-up and Stetson. That’s his car outside. He opened the place a decade ago, and has weathered the temperamental dude-food storm by holding firm to his meaty manifesto. The restaurant has now been co-signed by the US’s current wave of outlaw country stars, with Margo Price and Charley Crockett both regulars, proving this is no parody but the real deal. There’s even a bar next door, The Flying W Saloon, where you can sink Miller Genuine Draft and the strongest margaritas this side of Tijuana.
Texas Joe’s food menu is short and rightfully so. You’re here for their low-and-slow cooked barbecue and that's what you’ll get, alongside a couple of Tex-Mex tacos. The best sides are the gussied-up Frito Pie, salty corn chips layered with beans and cheese for an emergency take on nachos. The glossy, sweet and snappable hot beef sausage also delivers a satisfying hit of salt, while bacon-wrapped jalapeno poppers are gut-busting bullets stuffed with molten cream cheese. Hulking marrow bone, seeming plucked from a dino display at the Natural History Museum, provides significant slimy sustenance.
Be careful. Don’t fill up before the main event. Our fiesta of BBQ starts with perfectly pink pork ribs coated in a bark so dense and heavy you half expect it to launch into a Black Sabbath riff. Mutton shoulder doesn’t just fall off the bone as much as run away from it. Peppery beef brisket is the kind of juicy flesh that men who read Kerouac and wear bandanas write stream-of-consciousness poems about. There’s also tri-tip steak and beef short rib. Oh, and chicken thighs for people who don’t really like BBQ but are doing their best to show willing. Slaw and pickles come on the side. Sauce is frowned upon. The meat should be - and is - good enough without it, cooked for hours with a simple salt and pepper rub. The white slice, so beloved of US BBQ joints, is available on request, no doubt due to most British diners being so flummoxed by its appearance that they simply left it uneaten on the platter.
Saddle up, Texas Joe’s is a ride worth taking.
The vibe An authentic American BBQ joint filled with western goodies.
The food Traditional slow-smoked Texan meats and hearty sides.
The drink US beers and punchy margaritas.
Time Out tip Visit Texas Joe’s very own dive bar, The Flying W Saloon, next door.
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