There's nothing quite like having a man gently cup your undercarriage during the course of a working day. Edit Suits makes the process of getting a bespoke suit easier by coming to you, whether at home, or in my case, work. Armed with books of sample fabrics and a huge amount of warmth, outfitter Reto Peter kicked off the process by ascertaining some of the 30-plus points of measurement that go into the perfect suit. As well as making use of a traditional tape measure, pictures were taken to record my slope and stance, while a device similar to a spirit level was used to check the angle of my shoulders. Gadgets are one thing, but the real fun came from picking out fabrics. Reto politely steered me away from picking an Ikea-evoking canary-yellow lining. Discussions around buttons and pockets followed, and three weeks later, it was ready for a fitting. To my untrained eyes, it looked banging, but Reto advised a small tightening under the shoulders to give me what he called 'an hourglass figure'. With images of being the male Christina Hendricks in my head, I agreed unreservedly. And he was right - the finished article did exactly what a good suit should do: make you feel like the big man.
The measure: I finally have the dream suit. Bring on my next court appearance!
Cost: From £389 (mine was £599)
Turnaround time: Three weeks
How to book: Visit www.editsuits.com
10 Devonshire Row, EC2M 4RH. Tube: Liverpool St.
By Oliver Keens