We asked 10,000 Londoners to tell us about their lives – everything from work and relationships to pet peeves and hygeine habits. Here's the unvarnished truth about how we're all really getting along...
The average salary was £29,500. We also asked you how much you thought you'd need to earn to live 'comfortably.' The average answer to that question was £38,500 - that's 30% more!
But it gets worse. The more Londoners earn, the higher they think the 'comfortable' salary is. In fact, it's only people who earn £70,000 or more who usually think they earn more than a comfortable amount.
The silver lining? Because we all feel chronically broke no matter how much we earn, increases in income have a very minor impact on people's happiness. There are much easier ways to reduce your stress levels and boost your mood.
We asked everyone how happy and how stressed they'd been feeling recently. Then we looked at some of their other answers to see if there was any connection. Besides a good night's sleep, some of the attributes most likely to boost wellbeing were...
Having a short commute +8.3% Exercising in past week +7.8% Cycling instead of taking tube +6.9% Having sex in past week +6.5% Being in a relationship +5.0% Not relying on coffee +4.7% Calling family in past week +3.7%
Some things that didn't really make a difference were drinking alcohol, drug use, having children or working from home. The last one's surprising considering longer journeys to work were correlated with increased stress, but we guess it gets a little bit lonely.
6.2% of respondents had pulled a sickie in the last seven days alone. That implies the average Londoner helps themselves to 3.2 'magic holiday' days each year. But generally speaking, we're much more likely to be nice than naughty. Here's what you all got up to in the last week:
61% called mum or dad 57% did some exercise 34% had some sex 33% drunk to the point of getting hungover 31% had a bit of a cry 20% watched porn 8% tried to chat someone up 7% used recreational drugs
We asked you for your pet peeves and you didn't hold back. Some choice suggestions included..
'CYCLISTS on the canal TOWPATH who think they're BRADLEY WIGGINS.' 'Other PEOPLE being everywhere all the time, NOISILY. Especially neighbours walking around their flat for the entire night. DON'T THESE FOOLS EVER STOP MOVING?' 'London DATING! Too many RULES. Not ENOUGH decent GUYS!' 'IGNORANCE of Jesus CHRIST.'
Here are some of the words you mentioned most...
Asked to pick from a selection of potential urban annoyances, London's hard-working but seemingly everpresent 'street fundraisers' raised the most hackles... and we found motorists more objectionable than cyclists. So there.
And 35% of Londoners think it's improving, versus just 22% who believe the city is in decline.
The small print: 13,641 Londoners participated in the survey, of which 10,982 answered every question. Participants were visitors to timeout.com/london during July 2015 and are not necessarily representative of the city population as a whole. Averages, where provided, are median figures, representing the 'middle' Londoner.