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Harvest 2013

Wed Sep 11, 8-9pm, BBC2

‘Volcano Live’! ‘Lambing Live’! ‘Death Live’! The latter is surely the next logical step as the BBC continues to exhaust the possibilities of broadcasting massive tedium, as it happens. Gregg Wallace and Philippa Forrester will be revealing the results of this year’s harvest as it comes in, in a concept which sounds DOA to us (particularly after the debacle that was ‘Planet Earth Live’) but may hold some appeal for die-hard ‘Countryfile’ fans.

The coverage (running for the next three nights, so let’s hope Mother Nature is up to it) begins tonight in Lincolnshire, where a farmer scrutinises his potato crop (‘Here they come! Here come the spuds!’), while Wallace examines new techniques for growing baby vegetables and Forrester visits Britain’s biggest greenhouse. Probably one to file under ‘Pitches Rejected By Alan Partridge As Too Absurd’.