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The Apprentice

Wed May 8, 9-10pm, BBC1

Series nine, episode two
A neat little hop onto the latest consumer bandwagon as this new run of ‘The Apprentice’ continues. It’s craft beer time. Can the teams produce their own flavoured brands and then flog them to the discerning punters of southern England? Given that most ‘Apprentice’ contestants are strictly Wetherspoons and Wkd Blue types, this task should be great, fish-out-of-water fun.

And so it proves. By the end, assorted gobshites on both teams are barely on speaking terms, one team has attempted to sell beer to trade outlets without taking any samples along and one contestant is already worrying about ‘smelling desperate’. Don’t worry, dearie. You all smell as desperate as each other. And that’s exactly the way we like you…