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[title]How can we raise our kids to be independent in the classroom and beyond? BASIS Independent Manhattan, a liberal arts, STEM-focused private school that caters to children grades K–8, offers thoughtful tips on encouraging your kids to take ownership of their schedules and approach the outside world with confidence.
#1 Teach children to own their schedules
Annie Woo, 3rd Grade Learning Expert Teacher:
In school, we ask the students which class comes next instead of dictating where they’re going to go! We have to give kids the proper tools to be independent, so of course we start off with plenty of guidance throughout the school day and after school. We’re teaching children at a young age to be an active participant in their education. We focus heavily on educational skills that include things like children using their binders, cubbies and lockers. We also cut time out during the day to provide extra support, and every teacher has office hours. We stay for two hours each week, and during that time we can help kids with a variety of things. Many students come for extra support with their binders to get help putting folders in, learning where their notebook belongs, where their planner for homework belongs…We have specific orders for those items at BASIS Independent Manhattan, so we help students practice over and over until they get it right. At home, parents can apply the same skills. You can ask your child what they would like to do in the morning, afternoon or evening instead of setting the agenda for the day.
Jesse Rizzo, Head of School:
One tip I love to give parents about schedules is to have some kind of chalk board wall or scheduling area in your home. Then the kids can see if they have violin practice on Wednesday and capoeira on Saturday, and they just start to know their schedule and visualize it. They can go to that wall and know what they’re doing on that day and the next day. Knowing what’s happening and when helps build accountability.
#2 Identify an educator at school to be a coach for your child
JR: Becoming more independent and able to self-advocate are important life skills that can and should be further developed in a school environment. To aid a child in developing these skills, it’s important for parents to be able to identify an educator (or a few) at school that their student can go and self-advocate with. If a student is having trouble navigating the building or understanding their schedule, you can identify a dean or the support person beyond his or her teacher. If the child is having social or emotional concerns, the issue can go to a teacher.
Parents need to be well-versed in the staff and faculty—who to go to and when. Contact the Head of School, principal, teacher, front office—the school website is also another great resource. Every school is structured slightly differently, so if you start at a new program, make sure to take the time to learn the structure.
At BASIS Independent Manhattan, we employ a two-teacher model. Co-teaching is very different depending on the school that you’re in. Our model is called the LET and SET relationship. The Subject Expert Teacher (SETs) has a background in a particular field: We have a physicist to teach physics, an engineer to teach engineering class. It makes a difference because they know their stuff. Then, we hire Learning Expert Teachers (LETs) like Annie, who understand pedagogy. She understands the milestones and benchmarks that children need to hit throughout the year. It creates a holistic education for the child. When our kids come to school and need to advocate for themselves, they can go to an SET or an LET.
Photograph: Courtesy BASIS Independent Manhattan
#3 Teach kids to become self-directed learners
AW: We use these building blocks (mentioned earlier) to help create self-directed learners: We allow them to take ownership of their education at school and encourage it at home. It’s empowering! At school, they’re responsible for setting up their desks in a clean and organized way. We teach them to be mindful of their space so they can reflect on what they’ve learned. The same thing applies at home—to be aware of what works for them and what doesn’t. Will music in your ears work? Is that too distracting? Are there too many pencils on your desk? Is a sibling making too much noise around your study area?
#4 Teach kids how to be proactive problem solvers
JR: [We should] allow children to grow through their mistakes. We are so quick as adults to solve problems for our kids. If a kid falls and bumps a knee, we give them a Band-Aid; if they lose their jacket, we run around and try to find it for them; if they forget their homework, we try to solve it. I encourage parents to let kids come up with their own solutions. One way parents can do this at home is to—upon their child bringing up an issue or problem—ask, “So what are you going to do about it?” This puts the heavy thinking and ownership back on the child. When the child loses or forgets something, this is something the parent can say.
Our teachers are trained in a program called Love and Logic, a behavior management approach that we use for working with children. It’s a process for children to grow through their mistakes and learn from consequences of their own choices. For example, if a student fails a quiz, the teacher’s going to say, “What are you going to do about it?” If the student says, “I don’t know, I’m going to accept that grade,” then that’s what they’re owning. A teacher might say, “Would you like me to give you some suggestions on what you can do to pass the quiz?” and they might suggest going to office hours. The point here is that we want students to be self-advocates and say, “I forgot my homework, I failed my math quiz and I know I need to go to office hours now.” That’s what we’re looking for. It makes such a difference when a kid is told to do something versus when they actually want to do it on their own.
Photograph: Courtesy BASIS Independent Manhattan
#5 Integrate important life skills at home
JR: Children take great pride in even the smallest victories, right? They feel great when they increase a grade from a B to an A. Helping a friend get around the building by showing them to the right class makes them feel good. It is great when they can assist a buddy in opening a locker that they don’t know how to open. The same applies at home: Parents should integrate life skills at home so kids can feel a sense of pride and ownership in small things like making their bed, doing dishes or bringing their plate to the sink. Our students are aware that we are all valued members of the community, our contributions to the team matter and accountability is part of our culture.
We have something at BASIS Independent Manhattan called The 5 C’s: They stand for Courage, Creativity, Confidence, Citizenship and Compassion. The 5 C’s are connected to our broader mission. Students need to be ready for the world, and it’s not enough to just be book smart. Our students need not only to be smart, but to be able to talk to people, be kind and active listeners, take risks, know what it’s like to fail and get back up—you must look beyond the academics. You have to be smart, compassionate and courageous. You have to be confident, creative and a strong citizen.
BASIS Independent Manhattan is located on the Upper West Side at 795 Columbus Ave (manhattan.basisindependent.com, 347-305-4960).
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