Unfortunately, at some point in your life you're going to interact with people who aren't true New Yorkers. Maybe it's a relative or an old friend in for a visit, maybe it's someone who just moved and isn't a real New Yorker yet, maybe it's just an obnoxious tourist trying to get a selfie with one of the lions at the New York Public Library. Like it or not, you're gonna deal with them from time to time. And they're probably going to say totally annoying things like...
"The bagels back in St. Louis are just as good as the ones here."
"I love all these fancy new condo buildings! And I bet they're great for real estate values, too!"
"Famous Famiglia's is totally my favorite pizza joint. Have you been there?"
"With all the people living here, dating must be so easy!"
"Oh, I'd never take the subway. It's so dirty and crowded."
"When I come visit, let's go straight to Times Square!"
"Why would we go out to eat? You have a kitchen right here."
"Subway delays are not an acceptable excuse for being late."
"I really want to see Shakespeare in the Park. Can you grab tickets for me?"
"I hate to tell you this, but I don't think this apartment is worth what you're paying."
"Doesn't ordering from Seamless make you feel lazy?"
"Can we go to T.G.I. Friday's tonight?"
"There ought to be more toddler-friendly bars in this town."
"I just don't see any downside to gentrification."
"If you want to save money, just don't go out so much."
"Oh, my friend lives in Brooklyn, too. Do you know her?"
"Hey, slow down!"
"Ugh, real estate is the worst, right? My two-bedroom in Phoenix is going up to $1000 a month!"
"You must be so proud to come from the same town as Donald Trump."
"I don't get the big deal with Central Park. It's just a park."
"I met my wife the first week I moved here!"
"MetroCards should really cost more money, don't you think?"
"I found this cool new bar nobody knows about!"
"Sometimes a backpack deserves a seat, too."
"Oh, [insert NYC publication here] is way better than Time Out."
"Meh. Boston's nicer."