‘I failed Dry January before January began.’
‘I'm having a really phallic evening.’
‘I've just come out of there. My face feels like a disco ball!’
‘I don't want to sit in the Science Museum with a condom on my hand.’
‘Oh my God, I saw that... your Snapchat of your fart. Oh my God.’
‘Yes, I was sick into my Le Creuset casserole dish.’
‘No, I wouldn't ask your father for your hand. It's you I'm marrying, not him.’
‘He'll be laughing out of his ear holes!’
‘His personality is banging, but he needs to change his face.’
‘That is really unstereotypical of what I think of as a stereotype.’
‘Kebab lettuce is like sad confetti.’
Every week you share the weird things you’ve overheard in London. Above, a few perplexing snippets from the past seven days – don’t forget to tweet us your own!
Like Word on the Street? We’ve made a book of these little beauties! ‘Word on the Street: Ridiculous Things We’ve Overheard in London’ is out now, £6.99. To buy a copy, visit timeout.com/wotsbook.