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‘I think sometimes people just pretend to like olives, to give themselves a higher social status.’
‘Would you rather be bald with hairy feet, or one foot tall? It’s a conundrum.’
‘I don’t eat avocado. I’m not allergic, I just have a deep, visceral hatred for it.’
‘This revolving door is out of order due to a trapped fart.’
‘I can’t believe my life’s come to this: writing an Instagram post about aubergines.’
‘I only slept for ten minutes as I was eating crab sticks.’
‘We’ve had really disappointing potatoes today.’
‘I can feel myself baking like a roast chicken in this heat.’
‘Give me my nipple back!’
Every week you share the weird things you’ve overheard in London. Above, a few perplexing snippets from the past seven days – don’t forget to tweet us your own!
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