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22 of the funniest things Londoners have heard after sex

Maybe best to just cuddle quietly, eh?

By Alexi Duggins and Guy Parsons
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We asked for the ill-advised sweet nothings you've been whispered after sex. And with lines like these, we can only hope they were one-night stands.

More outrageous stories of intercourse gone wrong (and fascinating graphs!) in last year's almighty sex survey.


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