COOL THINGS TO DO
Cinekink NYC; Bowery Bliss
Sex fantasies come to life onscreen at this annual film festival. No literally. Today you can learn how to capture your hotness on camera with the fest's Intro to Making Your Own Porn class.
Freaks and Geeks Bingo; Videology
Nerdy games and dorkdom collide when this nerdy cult classic packs enough pop references (Bionic Woman costume, anyone?) and inside jokes for a weekly night of bingo.
Ringling Bros. and Barnum and Bailey present Circus Xtreme; Barclays Center
Yay, the circus is back! Also, for the first time, animal trainers will give the audience a peek at how they train and care for the elephants, addressing often controversial animal-rights concerns head-on during the show. So—yay, the circus!
St. Patrick's Day; Fifth Ave
Wear green for good luck and Irish pride. Also, go to any one of awesome St. Patrick's events we've highlighted, for optimal fun.
New York Spring Spectacular; Radio City Music Hall
This Spectacular celebrates New York in spring through Broadway numbers, puppetry and, of course, high kicks—look out for celebrity cameos (as puppets and people) as the iconic Rockettes guide you on a virtual tour through NYC’s landmarks.
AWESOME THINGS TO SEE
The Mystery of Love & Sex; Mitzi E. Newhouse Theater (at Lincoln Center)
As the title clearly indicates, romance is the topic of Bathsheba Doran's new dramedy. Tony Shalhoub stars as a concerned dad.
Chappie opens in theaters
Sci-fi writer-director Neill Blomkamp follows District 9 and Elysium with this story of an exceptionally gifted robot that walks, talks and thinks like a human.
The Audience; Gerald Schoenfeld Theatre
You've seen Helen Mirren play Queen Elizabeth II onscreen; now the British acting powerhouse plays the monarch in a series of meetings with prime ministers over the decades.
On the Twentieth Century; American Airlines Theatre
Kristin Chenoweth returns to the Great White Way in a revival of the snazzy 1978 musical comedy, set about a fast-moving train.
Cinderella opens in theaters
Kenneth Branagh directs a live-action version of the classic fairy tale, with British actor Lily James (Downton Abbey) as approachable "Ella" in the title role. Cate Blanchett is wickedly good as her evil stepmother Lady Tremaine, dressed to kill in the style of a 1940s femme fatale.
It Follows opens in theaters
In this fun, meta horror film indebted to the work of John Carpenter and others, the characters find themselves followed by a mysterious, slow-moving presence that can assume any human form.
Kumiko, the Treasure Hunter opens in theaters
Leaving behind her beloved pet rabbit Bunzo, a slightly cracked Japanese woman (Babel's Rinko Kikuchi) goes on a quest to find Fargo's missing suitcase of cash—a movie prop she believes to be real. Indies don't come stranger.
The Heidi Chronicles; Music Box Theatre
What wave is feminism in now? Third or fourth? Anyway, here is the late playwright Wendy Wasserstein's take on the first, starring Mad Men's Elisabeth Moss.
Insurgent opens in theaters
Never not impressive, The Fault in Our Stars' Shailene Woodley is back for a second stab at Veronica Roth's YA Divergent novels. New to the cast is Naomi Watts.
TASTY PLACES TO EAT
Mar 13, 14
NYC Craft Beer Festival; Lexington Avenue Armory
At this suds celebration, beer buffs can sip unlimited samples of nearly 150 local (Braven, Gun Hill, Dyckman) and cross-country brews (Founders, Down East Cider House), plus sit in on brewing and tasting seminars led by suds experts.
Mar 14, 15
NYC Vegetarian Food Festival; Metropolitan Pavilion
The fifth annual fete showcases two days of meat-free samples, cooking demonstrations and seminars on vegan and vegetarian living.
Just Food Conference; Columbia University
The brainy culinary convention returns with a packed lineup of intensive seminars, hands-on workshops, panel discussions, and film screenings focused on food education and policy.
Brisket King of NYC; Irondale Center
At this year's meat-master showdown, 20 chefs will compete for barbecue bragging rights, churning out plates like smoked brisket with pickled chilis and brisket-boudin balls that you can sample and pair with beefy cocktails like bouillon Bloody Marys.
Mar 21, 22
Coffee and Tea Festival NYC; Brooklyn Expo Center
Caffeine fiends can sample brews from more than 60 vendors like Wandering Bear Coffee, Dona Chai and SerendipiTea at this two-day tasting extravaganza.
ASTONISHING DANCE PERFORMANCES
PLATFORM 2015: Sara Mearns and Rashaun Mitchell + Sterling Hyltin and Jodi Melnick; St. Mark's Church
Danspace Project pairs stars from the ballet world with those from contemporary dance.
Vicky Shick Dance; 92nd Street Y
A remounting of the mesmerizing Pathétique, Miniatures in Details includes a playful, exaggerated new prologue.
Compagnie CNDC-Angers/Robert Swinston; Joyce Theater
The former Merce Cunningham dancer mines the work of his mentor for Event.
Paul Taylor's American Modern Dance; David H. Koch Theater
This season, the legendary choreographer includes works by Doris Humphrey and Shen Wei—but, mercifully, he's also presenting 19 of his splendid dances.
Armitage Gone! Dance; American Museum of Natural History
On the Nature of Things, choreographed by Karole Armitage, takes over the Museum of Natural History.
FANTASTIC SHOWS TO SEE
Mar 7–Jun 7
The Icelandic alt diva's arty antics are given an institutional seal of approval with her MoMA retrospective.
"Scenes for a New Heritage: Contemporary Art from the Collection"; MoMA
MoMA presses the reset button on its contemporary art galleries with this collection showcase of works created over the past 30 years
Mar 13–Aug 9
"Laurie Simmons: How We See"; The Jewish Museum
Lena Dunham's mom puts the l'oeil into trompe l'oeil with her photos of fashion models whose closed eyelids are painted with images of eyes.
Mar 17–Aug 16
"Fatal Attraction: Piotr Uklański Photographs"; The Metropolitan Museum of Art
A send-up of Kodak's official how-to book for amateur shutterbugs anchors this survey of the Polish bad-boy artist's forays into photography.
CONCERTS TO GO CRAZY AT
Animal Collective (DJ set); Output
Built By MeanRed hosts two of Animal Collective’s band members, Avey Tare and Deakin, for a solid midweek DJ set on Output’s golden Funktion Ones.
Björk; Multiple venues
Björk's not one for small gestures, so it makes sense that the Icelandic art-pop empress is headlining a little room called Carnegie Hall—kicking off a six-show local stint—the same day her surefire-blockbuster MoMA retrospective opens.
Blind Idiot God; The Paper Box
These NYC-via–St. Louis veterans celebrate their first new album since 1992, Before Ever After, a suitably gnarly slab of progressive-punk mayhem.
George FitzGerald + Leon Vynehall + Kenny Larkin + Lee Jones; Verboten
There is no way all four of these mean should be on one bill but hey, we're not going to complain. An embarrassment of riches.
Meghan Trainor; Irving Plaza
"All About That Bass" singer Meghan Trainor keeps the hit train rolling with her latest single "Lips Are Movin" and this gig at Irving Plaza.
Hozier; Hammerstein Ballroom
He's been to church, now Irish troubadour Hozier will bring his bluesy croon to Hammerstein Ballroom.
Celebrate Life: Dope Jams; Good Room
Lovably crusty musical curmudgeons Paul Nickerson and Francis Englehardt ran beloved Brooklyn record spot Dope Jams, where they would host legendarily messy dance parties in their tiny storefront. They've now moved the operation upstate , which makes it more of a DJ road trip, but occasionally grace us again with their presence on nights like tonight.
La Dispute; Webster Hall
The wordy Michigan crew behind one of 2014's overlooked gems, Rooms of the House, brings its post-hardcore epics to the East Village.
Miranda Lambert; Madison Square Garden
Nashville superstar Miranda Lambert, who still carries a down-to-earth vibe despite her hugely successful track record of hits, gigs behind her Billboard-topping fifth LP, Platinum.
INTERESTING AUTHOR EVENTS
From Book to Broadway: A Conversation with Hilary Mantel; 92nd Street Y
After a luminous run in London, the stage adaptations of Mantel’s Booker Prize–winning novels, Wolf Hall and Bring Up the Bodies, are coming to Broadway! The author and director Jeremy Herrin discuss making that happen.
Franklin Park Reading Series; Franklin Park
Every month, we look forward to host Penina Roth’s impeccable reading lineup. Drop by to see fantasy master Lev Grossman and more impressive writers.
Eat, Drink & Be Literary; BAMcafé
Dinner and a brilliant author, what more do you want? While you binge at the buffet, Lydia Davis talks with The New Yorker fiction editor Deborah Treisman about her work.
Brooklyn by the Book: Kazuo Ishiguro; Congregation Beth Elohim
One of the world’s greatest living writers (really) has just published his first novel in ten years, and he celebrates The Buried Giant with his Brooklyn fans tonight.
Poetry at the New Museum’s Triennial; St. Mark's Church
Don’t choose between visual art and poetry, just delve into the verse anthology published in conjunction with the New Museum’s latest exhibit. Tonight, editor Brian Doitcour and contributors share this unprecedented feat of collaboration.
COMEDY SHOWS TO CHECK OUT
Mar 5, 27 and 31
Creek Cave Live; The Creek and the Cave
This randomly reoccurring show has become a staple in the comedy scene and features this venue's favorite performers.
Hold On to Your Butts; Peoples Improv Theater
This shot-for-shot live remake of Jurassic Park is exactly like the film, if the film had no budget at all.
Homeschooled: A Comedic Lecture Series; UCBEast
What's laughing without learning? These comics ditch their sets to hilariously explain factual tidbits.
Al Madrigal; Carolines on Broadway
Daily Show correspondent reports on his life instead of just skewering the news.
Gary Gulman; Highline Ballroom
Stand-up and late-night show regular is taping his hour special over the course of two shows.
WONDERFUL LGBT EVENTS
St. Pat’s for All Parade; Sunnyside, Queens
Join Mayor De Blasio at this parade that welcomes leprechauns of every sort.
Broadway Backwards; Al Hirschfeld Theatre
Stars from the Great White Way perform gender-bent renditions of popular Broadway tunes.
Mar 19–Apr 9
Unitard: House of Tards; The Stonewall Inn
Mike Albo, Nora Burns and David Ilku are back onstage for some savage fun at the expense of…well, everything.
The International Escort Awards; BPM
The top (and bottom…) guys in the sex-work business compete for fame and glory at this cheeky awards ceremony (also known as the Hookies) hosted by Alaska Thunderfuck.
Rites XXXVI: The Black Party; Location TBA
This annual epic fetish party jumps the river to make its Brooklyn debut.
ACE PLACES TO SHOP
Tamara Mellon sale
Quick! Scoop up luxury apparel from the Jimmy Choo cofounder’s sample sale, where silk jumpsuits are slashed down to $150 (usually $1,195).
The Vintage Twin Pop-up
Now’s your last chance to scoop up fresh duds from this hip pop-up, which boasts faux-fur and outerwear pieces ($44) as well as chunky-knit sweaters for as low as $10.
FIAF Presents: Creative Leaders-Discussion with Bobbi Brown
Want to know the future of beauty? Learn all about it from Bobbi Brown, founder of Bobbi Brown Cosmetics.
Housing Works Best of Spring sale
Shop from this charitable thrift-shop chain and snatch vintage goods from over 250 stylish brands. Bonus: Proceeds will be donated to charity, so you can fully justify your purchases.
Mar 22–Apr 4
Macy’s Flower Show
This two-week floral display titled “Art in Bloom” features ceiling-to-floor greenery, fresh blooms as well as free workshops including terrarium making and floral design.