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Your head says you need beauty sleep but your heart says get shitfaced. We've got the ultimate solution
What's the absolute shittiest thing about nights out? Creepy bottom-pinchers? Beer showers? Maybe it’s the world-ending hangovers and the fact that going out pretty much ruins the next day. Now, increasingly, party-loving Londoners are avoiding the wee small hours entirely. These days it’s all about days out. And by that we mean day parties, those glorious events where no-one pretends they want to do anything else with their weekend afternoons than get royally on one.
Sure, there’s a cool exhibition on at that gallery, but what do you really want to do: contemplate a 3D-printed dildo or throw dutty moves and drink double your weekly recommended units, all before tea-time? Exactly.
So cook up a mean breakfast and ignore the dirty looks as you crack open the Holsten Pils before noon – here’s our pick of the best daytime parties across London, from the cheap and cheerful to the serious sesh.
Not content with dishing up Hackney Wick’s best pizzas and brewing their own delicious craft bevs, the people from Crate decided to open Mick’s Garage, an airy warehouse space on Queen’s Yard. With early-bird tickets going for a fiver or so, and some events being free (until it gets rammed), Mick’s Garage is one of the cheapest ways to get your party fix. It’s mostly a summer thing, running from April, but you can still find afternoon vibes throughout the year.
Best for: Summer, skint people.
Phonox in Brixton is for proper clubbers. You’ll get reprimanded for having your phone out on the dancefloor, which means you won’t be distracted by Hugo’s selfies every two minutes whilst you’re trying to get on it.
On Sundays, it’s just like a proper night out, in a proper club, only events run from 2pm till midnight- ish. The best part? Big-name DJs spanning a range of genres are queuing up for a day shift at the Brixton club. We’re talking Daniel Avery playing a ten-hour set, or Jackmaster rinsing it out, all before the last tube. Glorious.
Best for: Pretending Monday is never going to happen.
Housed in what was once Europe’s largest print facility in Canada Water, Printworks is no casual day out. It’s everything you want from a big session: amazing sound, huge-name DJs and a crazy light show, all in one of London’s most interesting spaces. Only, doors open from noon.
Refreshingly, they don’t try and rip you off, either: you can get a pint for a fiver, and there’s even a decent food served in the courtyard from Earl’s Serious Sandwiches and Bang Wok, for when you need to refuel. Printworks only opened in 2016, but it’s fast becoming one of the London’s best-loved venues, with tickets selling like hot cakes.
Best for: Going on a mad one.
If there’s one thing Londoners love, it’s getting wrecked in a warehouse. Wapping’s Tobacco Dock fits the bill perfectly: a nineteenth-century former storage unit for New World baccy that’s now a multi-use venue space for up to 5,000 people.
Such a massive venue could be problematic: think about how complicated it is to leave Fabric. But Tobacco Dock mercifully gets the basics right – toilets, queues and crowds – so you can get on with bopping to house and tech from the likes of Nina Kraviz, Maya Jane Coles and Axel Boman while it’s still light outside.
Best for: Big crowds and big vibes.
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