We've ranked celebrities' Sketch bathroom selfies

Serena Williams has one of the most powerful serves in professional tennis. But can she serve powerful lewks in another equally competitive arena: the Sketch bathroom selfie? Yesterday, she spent a penny in what might just be London's most famous loos: the gleaming, egg-shaped white cubicles at Sketch. And like thousands have before her, she took to insta to document this most special of wees, posing alongside her young daughter Alexis Olympia Ohanian, Jr. 

Here's how her bathroom selfie compares to some of the all-time influencer greats, judged on criteria including artistry, composition, and all-round creative flair.


5. Kylie Jenner
Kylie Jenner's business acumen is unquestionable. In 2020, Forbes named her the youngest ever self-made billionaire for her lip kit-based beauty empire. But although artist-businessmen like Damien Hirst have shown that cash and creativity can (just about) co-exist, Jenner's Sketch bathroom selfie definitely lacks flair. Her face is covered by her phone, in what could be an enigmatic, surreal gesture reminiscent of Magritte's paintings – the ironic slogan 'no photos please' on her phone case adds to the sense of mystery – but ends up feeling like a surprisingly apathetic entry from someone who's so schooled in the ways of influencerdom. Still, who needs to make an effort when you've got 355 million followers? 

4. Bella Hadid
This undeniably basic entry is the pumpkin spiced latte of bathroom selfies, featuring two vintage influencer photo poses: duckface alongside its successor, the stuck-out tongue. Still, there's something about this picture that makes you take a second glance. The curved outlines of the pods behind create a circle that neatly frames its subjects, while the concentration in Hadid's eyes as she takes the photo draws attention to the craftsmanship at play here, presenting her as a skilled artist who knows exactly what she wants (fame) and how to get it (immaculately shot selfies). 

3. Serena Williams
This tennis star is too famous to take her own selfies: those precious hands are for unleashing killer volleys only. Instead, her husband has taken this pic from a carefully chosen vantage point. Yes, it makes Serena look like she's just landed on an undiscovered planet, populated by the gleaming egg sacs of a yet-undiscovered alien race. Yes, there's a rookie compositional error (poor Serena's feet are cut off). But it's more than made up for by the hand-on-hip confidence of her Greek statue-like power pose, echoed in her daughter's winning over-the-shoulder gaze: it's in the genes. 

2. Marina Diamandis
Now this is more like it: the Welsh singer-songwriter's enchanting selfie mixes Amelie-esque quirkiness with a pleasing vignette effect that heightens the curves of the eggs behind her. Dancing highlights and reflections create a sense of playfulness and fun, while Mariana's pose echoes the surrealism of the setting, like she's a stiff-limbed doll hanging out in the ultimate London toybox. 

1. Sophie Turner
What's actually going on here? It looks like Sophie and her friend are in training for some kind of nightmarish mime-based fringe theatre performance, with their all-black outfits and strange angular poses. But for all the weirdness, their sense of fun is infectious. The photo is taken on a slant, encouraging your eye to dance restlessly around the image, while the framing offers gentle nods to the setting (those coloured windows) without seeming gauchely overexcited by it. Sorry Serena, but it's a winner. 

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