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Michelin stars, ice cream and car boots - Chiswick's got the lot.
Why go there?
For historic watering holes, fancy restaurants and the chance to spot young parents pushing around designer pushchairs that cost more than you earn in a month.
Sounds quiet, anything going on after midnight?
Not much, but you'd be surprised how much fun you can have with an 11pm curfew. The 200-capacity function room at The George IV pub on Chiswick High Road is home to Blue Flowers, a club night which played host to Adele and Sam Smith way before your mum got into them. The pub also hosts Headliners Comedy Club, which boasts past performances from Michael McIntyre, Jimmy Carr and Bill Bailey.
Where can I eat?
Head to the High Road, and start with The Hothouse for coffee and pancakes. For lunch, go to Neil Rankin's Smokehouse on Sutton Lane North: a barbecue-themed gastropub with a huge beer garden. The pub is nestled beside a former town hall with a pitched roof, which also happens to be home to the quaintest gym in London.
So where do all the hedge-fund managers eat, then?
The Michelin-starred La Trompette on Devonshire Road delivers French food and impeccable service. Chiswick's other proud star-owner is Hedone on the High Road, which serves contemporary European cuisine and was recently named the sixtieth best restaurant in the world by the (illogically titled) 'World's 50 Best Restaurants Guide'.
Now how about a daytime drink?
While away the day with a pint at one of the pubs by the river at Strand-on-the-Green. There has been an inn on the site of The Bulls Head for over 400 years and it's one of the area's most picturesque Thameside boozers.
Enough food and booze! Anything else to do?
Chiswick House was built by the third Earl of Burlington in 1729. If you don't want to cough up for the full tour, go for a wander through the surrounding gardens. They provided inspiration for New York's Central Park and are free to enter.
What if I want to splash the cash?
The Old Cinema sells antiques and vintage furniture on Chiswick High Road. But, for those on a budget, Chiswick Car Boot Sale (Burlington Lane) is held on the site of Phil Collins's old school every first Sunday of the month.
And if I only do one thing?
Get an ice cream from Foubert's on Turnham Green Terrace, a stalwart of the Chiswick area since the '70s.
By Tom Allsop, who'd like a house at Strand-on-the-Green but will settle for a free pub table on a Sunday.
Fancy a change of scene? Take a look at the best bits of Wapping.