Six of the best naughty hotels in London

The several interconnecting townhouses that make up this seriously romantic hotel look rather different today than they would have in 1837 when Mr and Mrs Brown opened the hotel, but we think the far-sighted couple would approve of the Rocco Forte touches here – particularly in the Donovan Bar. This darkly sexy space is filled with brooding 1960s works by the celebrated photographer Terence Donovan; make for the ‘naughty corner’ filled with his more risqué black and white shots, and let the photos and space work their desired magic.

Few things scream sexy so much as a secret and South Place has two. One is their secret garden, a surprise oasis with a waterfall and palm trees. The other is their Prohibition era-inspired speakeasy Le Chiffre, a sleek salon with cute cocktails that look good enough to eat (and often are). Events are hosted regularly here, from live DJs to boozy pop-ups, so you can party the night away just moments from your bed. You’ll be happy to know that all rooms come with at least a king-size bed and baths big enough for two, but if you save up for Suite 610 you’ll be in for a real treat. This one-bed apartment is huge, has a glass-sided bath (as well as a separate marble en suite) and artwork created from vintage pornographhy. Ooh la la.

This charming hotel may seem unassuming at first, with good rates, free wifi and a confusing name – the whole shebang – but it has one special feature that makes it perfect for whirlwind romances: there is a day-stay option. Check-in at 10am, check out at 4pm. It’s probably there for photo shoots or to give hurried business folk somewhere to set up base for the day, but let’s not pretend you can’t find a much, much better use for it – especially if you book a Shoebox room, which the website describes as ‘ideal for one (or for two, but be prepared to get up close and personal…)’.

Book in at Sanctum's Junior Suite for a bit of slinky disco sexiness. There are mirrors just about everywhere, so you can admire your beautiful selves from many angles, and the bathtub, which is right by the bed, is uplit, abutted by a mirrored column and flanked by a voyeuristic shimmering silver curtain. Or opt for the bigger Junior Deluxe Suite, a aple pink palace with a separate sitting room and silk in abundance.

Hotting it up in front of a fire place is hands down the classiest of romantic activities. But how could you top that? Doing under the stars perhaps? Naughty! Best book a room quick sharp at The Marylebone then, because their Terrace Suites have fireplaces on each suite's private, wood-pannelled terrace. Of course, if the weather isn't playing ball (when does it in Britain?) you'll be pleased to know the windows and roof are fully retractable.

Blakes is temporarily closed, but will reopen once Covid restrictions lift.

From the minute you set foot in Blakes' foyer, you'll be transported – their dark, dramatic decor oozes the kind of glamour found in movies and fashion ads. Just the ticket to aid any romantic fantasy. Splash out on the Signature Double, which comes in eight different opulent themes, but if you need help choosing, opt for the Venetian elegance of 'Josephine' (the bed resembles a gondola) or the 'Romantic Four-Poster', which has a burnt ash and burgundy colour scheme and so many drapes you're guaranteed to overdose on intimacy.