The best naughty hotels in London

From the minute you set foot in Blakes' foyer, you'll be transported – their dark, dramatic decor oozes the kind of glamour found in movies and fashion ads. Just the ticket to aid any romantic fantasy. Splash out on the Signature Double, which comes in eight different opulent themes, but if you need help choosing, opt for the Venetian elegance of 'Josephine' (the bed resembles a gondola) or the 'Romantic Four-Poster', which has a burnt ash and burgundy colour scheme and so many drapes you're guaranteed to overdose on intimacy.

The several interconnecting townhouses that make up this seriously romantic hotel look rather different today than they would have in 1837 when Mr and Mrs Brown opened the hotel, but we think the far-sighted couple would approve of the Rocco Forte touches here, particularly in the Donovan Bar. This darkly sexy space is filled with brooding 1960s works by the celebrated photographer – and the bar's namesake – Terence Donovan. Make for the ‘naughty corner’ filled with his more risqué black and white shots and let the photos and space work their desired magic.

Giving you the fantasy of an upmarket 1970s porno, Sanctum's Junior Suite is scoring very high on the sexy scale. Decked out in black and silver, the rooms here come finished with mirrors everywhere, including (of course) opposite the bed. Then there’s the freestanding bath, which sits at the foot of the bed and comes flanked by a mirrored column and uplit by shimmering pebbles. If that’s not doing it for you, maybe the glittering pink palace Junior Deluxe Suite would be more up your street. Here, you’ll find a bigger space with a separate sitting room and silk in abundance.

Secrets are sexy – and South Place Hotel has two up its sleeve. To get things hotting up, head to the Secret Garden rooftop for a few cheeky drinks, then go down to the Prohibition-inspired speakeasy Le Chiffre, named after the Bond villain. You’ll be happy to know that all rooms come with at least a king-size bed and baths big enough for two, but if you save up for Suite 610 you’ll be in for a real treat. This huge, open-plan room has a glass-sided bath (as well as a separate marble en suite). Ooh, la la.

You know the Shangri-La. It’s the hotel in that massive building made of glass. The rooms are just as sleek, with the body-contouring-technology ‘Shangri-La Bed’ and plush bathrooms with robes and Acqua di Parma toiletries. There are even floor-to-ceiling windows, which offer unparalleled views of the city. Plus, there's nothing naughtier than adding a spot of voyeurism to your flirtations and The Shard's windows provide that opportunity in spades. 

This charming hotel may seem unassuming at first, with good rates, free wifi and a confusing name – the whole shebang – but it has one special feature that makes it perfect for whirlwind romances: there is a day-stay option. Check-in at 10am, check out at 4pm. It’s probably there for photo shoots or to give hurried business folk somewhere to set up base for the day, but let’s not pretend you can’t find a much, much better use for it – especially if you book a Shoebox room, which the website describes as ‘ideal for one or for two, but be prepared to get up close and personal.’

Keeping each other cosy in front of a fireplace is hands down the classiest of romantic activities. But how could you top that? Doing it under the stars, of course. The Marylebone offers just that with their Terrace Suites, which are spacious, luxurious rooms with stunning views across the city. They also have fireplaces on their private, wood-panelled terraces. If the weather isn't playing ball (when does it?) you'll be pleased to know the windows and roof are fully retractable. The suites also come with a personal mixologist, who will come and kick start your evening of wooing with a specially-made cocktail each.